Week 6 Suitcase Clinic Class Blog
Welcome students in the class,
Remember that your first blog entry is due before your midterm on October 13th, 2011. Here are the instructions for posting on the blog:
We want you to write on any topics that relate to your unfolding experience in Suitcase, your perspectives on homelessness, any in-class topics that have been discussed, or other similar subjects related to Clinic. For example, your blog post could be about a story related to a clients experience with the clinic, a dinner that you recently served at clinic, or your interactions with clients, caseworkers, or service providers.
Although your thoughts may not be clinic related, please post a response that is related to homelessness, healthcare, the Suitcase Clinic, or any of the issues or topics related to these. If you wish to post something not clinic related, then contact Trevor Cline, the webmaster, and he can help walk you through the blog posting process.
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Starting this week, my Monday and Wednesday nights will be tied up
until November, so I thought I’d check out Women’s Clinic last week before that
happened. I went there for the tour back when we were submitting in
applications, and I thought it was great. But what I experienced last Monday
was something else entirely. When I arrived, I stood around awkwardly for a while.
I previously only had experience with General Clinic so I thought I’d have to
sign in or something and then sign up for some activity that I wanted to do for
the night. Nope. I was told to just jump in there and hang out with the women.
I ventured over to the main room and sat down next to some knitting materials
that were set out for the women. Eventually, some of the women came over to sit
with me. They smiled at me and sat down to knit. I racked my mind with words to
say and start up a conversation. I really didn’t have experience with this at
General Clinic, since I volunteered with Computer Literacy and mostly just
watched the demonstration since it was my first time. What was I supposed to
say? I didn’t want to ask how their day went–what if it went horribly and they
came over to just knit in peace? I didn’t know how to knit either, so it seemed
unlikely that I could keep up a stimulating conversation about knitting. When
the women started up conversation with me, we had a perfectly good conversation
and that was that. It was then that I realized that I was worrying about absolutely
nothing.
After that, I felt a lot more comfortable with this hanging out
thing, as silly as that may sound. Later on that night, I ended up painting a
few of the women’s nails and had my own nails painted—first by a lovely lady
who insisted on painting my nails with a clear coat and instructed me to eat
jello, which apparently has horse hooves in them, to strengthen my brittle
nails, and second by two adorable kids who asked politely if they could paint
my nails. They painted my nails various shades from construction cone orange to
drag queen lipstick pink. But who could say no to those lovable faces?
All in all, I thoroughly enjoyed going to Women’s Clinic and I can’t
wait to go back!
Deborah-PT
I had a similar experience at the Youth Clinic. I’ve shadowed there twice now, and each time, I learned something new. I, too, was hesitant about interacting with individuals from such a stigmatized group, and being socially awkward, I was even more worried about freezing up, offending them, etc. When I was told to “jump in there” during my first night at Youth, I didn’t really know what to do and kind of walked around aimlessly. However, when a client sat down next to me and struck up a conversation, I was amazed at how naturally the conversation flowed. It was like talking with an old friend. Since then, I’ve been much more comfortable in my interactions with clients. I would love to try caseworking at Women’s, too. It really sounds fun there!
Both times I have been to clinic (once at Women’s and once at General) I felt the same way in the beginning, and it’s nice to know that I’m not alone in feeling the way. I feel like it’s really easy to get self conscious and nervous, but then when people begin to open up, and just welcome you into their lives, even if it is with just a simple conversation, it is a welcomed surprise and reminds you to have faith in humanity, especially at women’s clinic, where they welcome you into their homes. By the end of the night, though, you always feel comfortable and leave with a feeling of excitement about being able to come back again next week. After I finished at the foot washing station, I was just kind of hanging out, and didn’t really know what to do with myself. These women who were watching a show on T.V. invited me to come watch with them, and just whole heartedly welcomed me into their conversations. Sitting and talking with them was one of the best parts of my night, and reminded me to not be so worried and just enjoy the conversations.
-Theresa PT
My first time volunteering at the Women’s Clinic I wasn’t sure of what to do either. I ended up being able to watch and play with the kids, and I agree they are adorable! Though I was quite hesitant about playing with the kids at first, thinking they would have been hard to take care of. Although, just like the women sitting down and striking up a conversation with you was just like the kids readily approaching me with their hugs, despite them not knowing who I was. The Women’s Clinic just has a very friendly and welcoming atmosphere. I also agree with how easy it was to talk and get to know the people there, in my case the kids. Its like once you’ve introduced yourself to them you’ve instantly made a new friend.
Jill- RA
Although I’ve made attempts to visit the Women’s Clinic, I
have not yet managed to do so. After reading about your experience though, I definitely
want and need to go. It definitely sounds like a very different environment
than that at General Clinic and I am eager to check it out. In regards to
conversations that spark up during clinic, I’ve had very similar experiences
thus far. Some of the people I’ve had the privilege to talk with at the General
Clinic have turned out to be the sweetest and friendliest people ever. Afterwards,
I always reflect and think back to those conversations and the great amiability
from these people and it saddens me to think that these people are commonly
ignored and made invisible by society, when they too have their stories to
share and opinions to offer. You learn so much from them, a lot more than I
ever expected.
Ivette-MA
I felt the same way when I first arrived at the clinic during my two clinic shadows. My first task was to do outreach at the youth clinic for the wellness project. I thought I would simply inform the clients; however, they seemed to be very interested in learning more about the wellness project. I guess that broke the ice and kept our conversations going. On the other hand, I hanged around for a long time at the general clinic, before I was paired up with a case worker at the general clinic. I have decided to start conversations with client, by asking them about the their “objects” on hand, such as a client who was drawing and I started asking about what is in the picture. At the end, I think it comes down to the fact that we need to get everything “warm-up” at the start of clinic hours.
Cynthia-EV
I was reluctant about SHARE. Despite my Suitcase training so far and my 3 years in sociology, there was still a part of me that believed that the homeless would be difficult to converse with, much less to discuss issues of deep significance with. I assumed they would be spouting nonsense about the impending apocalypse, among other things. My experience last Tuesday at a SHARE discussion proved me dead wrong.When I found my way to the SHARE discussion circle, there were already a few clients there. I tried my best to look comfortable and told myself that whatever “craziness” came out of their mouths, I would nod and smile like it totally made sense. However, once a few more volunteers joined us and the discussion was under way, I found myself continuously floored by the wisdom and insight that they provided instead. I found out that many of them were active in local politics and were trying to stay informed about new laws and changes, and that some even had college degrees. Given, there were a few instances where the comments made by some clients kind of threw me off, but overall, I found that they had so much to say about things that matter, and that there is so much that we can all learn from them. The hour flew by, and before I knew it, I was putting the chairs away and getting ready to go home. I came away with so much more respect for this stigmatized population laden with negative stereotypes. Their voices are too important to ignore, and with the lack of mediums for which they can be heard, SHARE becomes that much more important for us volunteers to participate in. I realize that not every individual in this population is as articulate as the ones at the discussion on that particular night, but this only goes to show that more must be done to empower and enfranchise them. I’m already looking forward to the next time I can attend SHARE.
I have yet to go to SHARE, but from the way you describe it,
it sounds like a mind-opening experience that one can gain a lot out of. Before
I came to the Suitcase Clinic class, uneducated was definitely one attribute
that I automatically associated with low-income and homeless people. I have
recently come to realize that I was terribly wrong, after having interacted
with some clients at Women’s and General Clinic. Many of these people are
educated; they just don’t have a job. And I believe that these people are
usually unemployed through no fault of their own. Though I’ve learned a great
deal about the unfortunate situations that homeless people must face,
especially employment barriers since I’m in the unemployment small group, I think
the most important lesson that I have learned from taking this class and coming
to clinic is to consider the situation. I have never considered myself a
judgmental person, but taking this class, I realized that I was.
I think in starting Suitcase, many of us are surprised at how “normal” and knowledgeable the clients are. Most of us have been raised with some level of normalcy in which we were provided a home, tools, and resources that we need to succeed, so we unconsciously disregard anybody who doesn’t fit our definition. I believe that Suitcase provides us with a unique opportunity to free ourselves from our own preconceptions and myths and to expand our minds. I think, in a sense, a lot of the clients are educated and some are “organic intellectuals.” I have learned so much from the clients by visiting the clinic just twice.
I completely agree with you in that their voices are too important to ignore and that they deserve to be guided so they can be more empowered. I am glad that Suitcase, through SHARE and its other resources, provides outlets through which this population can be heard, especially in today’s times. I have not attended SHARE yet, but I hope I gain from it as much as much as you have!
I had very similar misgivings about participating in SHARE. I thought it was going to be awkward! I’m from Los Angeles and in my years there I’ve had quite a few memorable experiences where I’ve crossed the street to avoid homeless who were having psychotic breaks, cursing and yelling at imaginary people. Due to these encounters, I had assumed that a majority of homeless were mentally unstable. However, I am glad to say that my assumptions were far off-base. The men I conversed with were extremely intelligent, well-spoken, and passionate about issues as varied as city redistricting, local politics, and low-income housing. They put me to shame, I realized that I hadn’t even registered to vote yet. I knew so little compared to them, most evidently in terms of life experience. They also informed me about many Berkeley-specific ordinances I had been completely unaware of. I feel fortunate to have been able to participate in such an eye-opening activity as SHARE.
I learned a very important
lesson at Suitcase last night. It all started when I was walking down
to volunteer at Womens Clinic for the first time, and a homeless woman
screamed at me: “Spare some change, Blondie?” as I walked past her. She
then proceeded to break out in a very loud rendition of “Like a Virgin,”
which echoed after me down the street. This put me in a very strange
mindset as I headed down to volunteer for some people who were, in fact,
very similar to the woman who had just yelled at me. Even though I have
learned so much about the stereotypes and misconceptions surrounding
the homeless community, I couldn’t help expecting Womens to be full of
“crazies” who might yell at me as I walked by. Instead, I met a deaf
woman who miraculously communicated very clearly to me that she wanted
me to paint her nails neon orange with white flowers. She even
demonstrated exactly how to paint the flowers, as I had no idea how to
make nail polish flowers. She was understanding and patient when I
didn’t quite get what she was trying to say to me, and was very willing
to repeat her gestures and motions until I understood what she was
trying to say. She was content just to sit in her chair and watch a
subtitled “Dancing with the Stars” as I (and another volunteer) painted
her nails. I was pleasantly surprised; This woman was calm, collected,
and kind, despite her situation in life. The difficulties that come
along with being deaf AND homeless seem nearly insurmountable to me, but
here she was, smiling at me when I finished the two coats of polish,
inspecting the color on her nails with a little twinkle in her eye.
My
lesson: Remember to suspend judgment. And remember perspective.
I agree with Josh about how many of us have these popular misconceptions concerning homelessness, that a lot of us may believe that they are where they are at due to poor choices and so they “deserve” it…when that’s not necessarily the case all the time. We see the screaming few on the streets, deem them as “crazies,” and assume the rest are like that! But working with them, going to these clinics, and getting to knowing them really does put things into perspective. Many of them are just like us. I mean, I don’t know about you, but I enjoy watching “Dancing with the Stars” too.
You bring up an interesting lesson learned–to suspend judgment and remember perspective. I think it’s very hard for us to completely erase these preconceived notions that we may have had or still hold. A lot of us are taught to do well in school, get straight A’s, blah blah blah so we wouldn’t end up homeless ourselves. But there are so many other factors that we can’t control! I feel as if we’re always going to have judgment whether it’s believing that homeless people do or don’t deserve to be in their state. I might be wrong, but I think that whatever we believe is still a judgment, it’s still an opinion, it’s still a certain pair of lens. Maybe the trick is to realize that it’s okay to form an opinion but to not be too quick to assume? to try not to judge in a discriminative fashion? I’m not quite sure and am still learning/figuring out what it means to have “judgment.” And again, I might be wrong or have a different understanding. Hmm . .
I like how you wrote, “The difficulties that come along with being deaf AND homeless seem nearly insurmountable to me.” Crazy how sometimes we complain about trivial things when there are people who are deaf AND homeless out there who still manage to find joy in the littlest things . . like painted nails!
When I volunteered at Women’s Clinic this past Monday, I
actually thought of your post! I was doing nails and a woman approached me with
a friend who spoke for her, telling me what the woman wanted and introducing
us. I was a little confused but went with it, making conversation while I filed
her nails and applied a base coat of polish. I thought she was being awfully
quiet but looked pleased with my work so I didn’t mind the silence we slipped
into. A few minutes later another woman resident of the clinic came by to talk
to this woman and called her a sister in a friendly way while signing the word
for “sister”. The other woman turned to me and said, “I love this woman! She’ll
teach you sign language if you want.” Finally it clicked—she had been reading
my lips to understand me, of course she was being quiet! I painted her nails
purple then let her go on her way to massage, but have been reflecting on the
trials of being deaf, let alone homeless/disadvantaged. She was very sweet and I
hope to see her again!
It was a slow night at general clinic this Tuesday, and most of the
services were finished with their clients by eight o’ clock. Because
there was no one to shadow, a few other students and I decided to catch a
few minutes of the SHARE meeting that had started an hour earlier. I
didn’t really know what to expect–the image of it that I had built up
in my mind was one of angry people standing on podiums and ranting to a
riotous group about the unfairness of it all. And while this would
have been completely understandable, given the harsh conditions and
prejudices that our clients endure every day, what I encountered was
something very different. I pulled up a chair to join a small group of
volunteers and clients excitedly discussing a trip to an upcoming city
council meeting to support the subsidizing of a new affordable housing
unit for people with mental illnesses. One of the clients was
particularly excited to support this measure, telling us that it is
things like this, support for affordable housing coming from a group of
people in all walks of life, that are what are going to turn things
around for the homeless in this country. As the client said, America is
the richest country in the world, and people shouldn’t have to be
living on the street. Things need to change, and it’s through groups of
diverse, dedicated people like these that it will happen. In listening
to him speak, I was struck by the simple truth in his words. Another
client expressed this sentiment in the most beautiful way I have ever
heard. He told us that he was not raised to be racist, and that even as
he looked around at the group and saw that we were all different
shades, all that he could see in us was sky blue, everywhere. If
everyone else in the world can learn to see everything in the same
beautiful light as this man can, despite the harsh hand that society
has dealt him, then things will really begin to change, and everything
truly will be sky blue.
Wow, what a truly motivational message. It
amazes me how inspiring a lot of our clients are. They have gone through so
many hardships and as much as we students like to complain about our lives, it’s
astounding to see their smiling faces despite not having the opportunity to
access basic necessities like shelter and food. I’m glad we have something like
SHARE where people such as these clients can share their ideas and have their
voice heard by other people who care about these important issues. I cannot wait to
attend a SHARE meeting myself. Looking forward to some new found wisdom!
Sunny – AS
Thanks for sharing your experience in SHARE, the clients in attendance
sound really inspirational, especially the man with the sky blue comment. When
interacting with clients through shadowing and case-working, I’ve been amazed
at how positive clients are as opposed to exhausted and jaded by society. For
example, a woman whose feet I washed and massaged had spent the entire day on
buses just for free laundry services. I would have expected her to be exhausted
and frustrated with society, but our conversation was actually incredibly positive
as we chatted about dresses and children’s health. Another man at general
clinic had been without his glasses for weeks yet cracked a million jokes when
receiving optometry services. While we are providing clients with services,
they return the favor in so many ways, especially helping us gain perspective
about what really matters at the end of the day. I hope to go to SHARE soon to
speak with more clients about their experiences and how those have shaped their
perspectives.
For my first two Suitcase Clinic experiences, I was able to
attend both Youth Clinic and then immediately the day after, General Clinic.
Youth Clinic is very laid back and more unstructured in a
way that I think greatly caters to the attitude of the clients. Volunteers aren’t
particularly assigned to a specific client or task for the night; we were
allowed to go with the flow and jumped right in with the clients. When clients
first arrive, we sign them in and ask them if they require any services for the
session. Most clients ask for socks and other health supplies but when they do
desire services like foot washing or massaging, we call them up when it’s their
turn in the order of when they signed in. In the meanwhile, the clients have
some dinner and relax, talking with each other or caseworkers. We also hold
wellness activities for them to enjoy, like arts and crafts or game night. The
environment is much more relaxed as caseworkers sit with clients to chat about almost
anything.
The next day, I went to General Clinic and after walking in,
I could sense a difference from Youth. General is much busier, as a lot more services
are offered to a wider range of clients. There were also many more hands on
deck that provided the services to the numerous clients who were present. Everything
was very structured: clients were asked which services they wanted and were
assigned a caseworker who would help them with their needs. I was given the opportunity
to shadow a caseworker who helped a client attend to a medical need. I got to
see one of the doctors interact with this client, as he referred her to medical
services in the area that could help her with her problems. After the
caseworking was done with this specific client, I was able to help out with
haircutting. Even as we were cleaning up, volunteers were hustling to finish up
with the last few clients who required some trimming.
Even with just these 2 shadowing experiences, I have come to
understand why we have set aside time for a clinic specifically catered to those
25 and under. It truly is great how Suitcase is able to target different
populations and accommodate to their specific needs!
Sunny – AS
I think it’s great that you’ve observed how each clinic
operates based on its particular group of clients. I took a tour of General
Clinic before getting into the class, but comparing that one perspective day to
the other two clinics I’ve shadowed at is definitely a huge shift in
atmosphere. It’s understandable that these clinics remain their own physical
separate entities because to whom they cater definitely sets the daily pace.
While Youth is more “unstructured”, it didn’t faze me because the majority of
clients seemed very happy and things seemed to be running okay from what I saw
as a shadow. Seeing as how I haven’t been to shadow at General, I’ve enjoyed
being able to sit down with the clients at the smaller clinics and open up
about “anything”, as you mentioned. Although conversations aren’t always to stimulate,
once you get started you’ve made a new friend with a multitude of stories to
share next time.
Feilisha – PT
I must admit that even though we’re half a semester in, I feel as though I’ve learned more from this class than some of my classes here in Berkeley over the course of a whole semester. A lot of times, we learn theory this, theory that, but we fail to put it to practice or we might be too lazy and/or afraid to go out there. There’s this quote by a psychiatrist named Carl Jung that goes, “Often the hands will solve a mystery that the intellect has struggled with in vain.” So that’s what I love about the Suitcase Clinic–we’re trying to solve this mystery with our hands. We’re trying to figure out homelessness by interacting with these people rather than strictly observing them from a distance and merely theorizing.Similar to previous posts, this experience erased many of my prior thoughts about homelessness. They aren’t all insane in the membrane. I appreciate the appreciation they show when we’re massaging them or washing their feet. I remember times when I accidentally massaged a little too hard or accidentally gave water a couple degrees less than the desirable warmth, and they responded with understanding and grace. A lot of them are hard working individuals who are trying to find comfort with some kind of stability. I met one client who recently broke up with her significant other and had no family within proximity. It was a bit difficult for her to get by, but I saw so much ambition with her wanting to go back to school and making the 1.5 hour commute to see us. I bumped into another client on the street, and he didn’t ask for change or anything like that; we exchanged a friendly waive and some small talk. Sometimes, I think that’s what they want–just for us to acknowledge them as people rather than someone beggin’ for change all the time.Maria-SA
I love the hands-on aspect of suitcase as well! It is awesome that we work so closely with clients to help improve the lives of the underprivileged population, but in a way that is not just giving out money. I used to sit through my Anthropology class as we discussed homelessness and get annoyed. All the readings had to do with simply observing populations and never actually working to change anything. Suitcase does one better in that the clinics actually strive to change people’s lives while also educating undergrads on what it means to be homeless. Also as you said, working at the clinic really breaks the stereotype that the homeless just want money. In reality they want to find a way to improve their lives, as I realized working with one client. She was struggling to do her best to kick a major drug addiction and seems to be making the steps in the right direction. It is very enjoyable to watch as people work to turn their lives around, and also very enlightening in that I would never before have been around people with such serious issues.
Whenever my family visited India, my mom would always shy away from blindly giving the impoverished people on the streets my extra change. However, when she saw a street vendor on streets trying to sell something to make a living and make a better life for himself, she would walk over and aid him in his pursuit, also buying something that she in turn needed. Whenever I saw this vast difference of action, I couldn’t help but wonder why she did so. I think the quote that we were shown in class by Lila Watson, “If you have come here to help me, you are wasting your time. But if you have come because your liberation is bound up in mine, then let us work together.” very eloquently has helped me put in perspective and understand my mom’s thought process and the purpose of the Suitcase Clinic.
Shadowing the past two weeks at the General Clinic, I have come to the realization that most of the clients want to be guided in the right direction so that they can pick up the pieces of their lives, not handed a golden platter from which they can directly eat. They don’t look for pity or sympathy, in fact the clients with whom I have interacted are very enthusiastically looking for ways in which they can improve their lives through the various services that the clinic offers. During my Clinic visits, I foot washed, shadowed and passed out bagels to clients. I thoroughly enjoyed and learned a lot from the experiences.The satisfaction and relief on the clients faces made foot washing a very humbling and empowering experience. Passing out bagels and shadowing was fun and also inspiring because I got to talk to the clients and listen to them tell fascinating and hilarious stories.
All in all, my clinic visits have shattered common misconceptions leading to the stigmatization of homelessness and the belief that these people have brought it upon themselves. Going to clinic has shown me that sometimes, with a little faith and a little push in the right direction, a lot of good can happen. I am really excited to go back to General Clinic and hopefully the other clinics too!
I like your interpretation of Lila Watson’s quote, and I agree! I have yet to try footwashing but I am sure it is a humbling experience. I didn’t realize the meaning behind the service until I visited General Clinic and witnessed how much in need this service was.
Also, I love how caseworking isn’t just about helping on the surface, but trying to find the root of the problem through building connection and communication. Admittedly, I had some stigmatized beliefs towards the homeless population and I used to be intimidated in interacting with them, but Suitcase has aided in breaking that barrier. I’m glad that a lot of are going through similar eye-opening experiences through the organization. I just wish that the clinic was open for everyone so we can share the experience with a bigger population (to anyone that’s interested in volunteering without the class). Thanks for sharing your story!Gimin – RE
I really like how Suitcase is about empowering the clients
instead of handing them what they need. I also did foot washing and was
surprised at how much the clients opened up to me and told me about their
lives! Foot washing was a very humbling experience and I am excited to do it
again. My visits to the Suitcase Clinic have also changed my conceptions of
homelessness. Seeing all the people at clinic does not make me feel hopeless
because there are so many people that need help, but hopeful that all these
people are looking for help. I believe the people in the Suitcase Clinic can
have a positive impact on so many lives. I now realize that helping them
physically is very important, but so is simply talking to them and building a
relationship with them. By building a relationship with the clients I think we
will have a better idea of how we can help them.
Alex Prekeges- JL
My first time caseworking was at the General Clinic. It was
a busy night and I was assigned to the Haircutting service, shadowing the
coordinators Kira and Kara. Knowing that I have never interacted with the
homeless population with the added pressure of cutting hair for the first time,
I wasn’t sure what to expect. I was determined to face this opportunity with an
open mind but I was definitely intimidated. Nonetheless, I started to feel more
comfortable as I witnessed the warmth and acceptance the coordinators gave off
to the clients, whom in turn reciprocated much friendliness through dialogue. I
remember distinctly how at ease the clients were not only in sharing their personal
stories but also in communicating their desired hairstyles, which showed their
confidence in the coordinators’ abilities. Several clients were clear in
stating that they did not mind in the end result of the style as much as they
appreciated our efforts in helping them.
Listening to the clients’ stories and interacting with them
one-on-one was an eye-opening experience. It may sound hackneyed, but hearing
their plight directly from the source outside of the Suitcase class put things
into perspective. First, the importance of caseworking and the existence of our
clinic was manifested when one client admitted, “I don’t know where I would be
without you guys”. I am sure he was referring to more than just the services we
offered, because he really enjoyed speaking to us and I could tell he was a
regular client. Also, the fact that we have become such an integral part of the
Berkeley community made me realize how proud I should be to be a part of it. The
more I volunteer at the clinics, the less I feel that it is a ‘volunteer
activity’, and the more I feel at home and comfortable. I always keep in mind
the Suitcase philosophy of going against the concept of mere charity, but
really being a part of the lives of the individuals who we are helping. I can’t
wait to build more connections with such a genuine and open-minded population,
which is truly unique to Suitcase Clinic.
oops.. this is Gimin, not Polkaturd (email address.) haha
My first experience shadowing wasn’t really so much a
shadowing experience, as hands on work. Since I went to Women’s Clinic for the
first time, the atmosphere is relaxed and I was assigned a task straightaway. I
started out doing foot washing. At first I was nervous about doing a bad job
and hesitant about interacting with the clients. However, as soon as I started
on my first client, I felt at ease. She was so friendly and open. I asked her a
few questions to encourage conversation and immediately she began to open up
about her life and various situations she’d been in over the years. It was so
interesting to hear about another kind of lifestyle, one where attending a
college isn’t the only option, where you travel the world, where you don’t plan
every aspect of your life years in advance. There’s something so valuable about
gaining perspective and this women had a life perspective that was polar
opposite to my own. What also stuck with me was how appreciative the clients
are. I was only doing a tiny service and every client was just so glad to have
us there. They could have been resentful or rude or angry that we had
advantages that they never received, but instead they welcomed us into their
temporary home with smiles and open hearts. It’s easy to have prejudices
against homeless, that they’re all lunatics, or somehow different, that they
did something to deserve their current situation. But when you’re there,
washing their feet and asking them about their lives, you realize that there’s
meaning behind the phrase: you can’t truly understand someone until you walk a
mile in their shoes.
My second experience involved sitting in at SHARE. At first
I was shy about participating, but the discussion was so lively that eventually
I felt it was necessary for me to step in and add my two cents. Again, I had
certain former prejudices taken down, this time being that the homeless are not
educated. In that circle, I was the one receiving the education. I realized how
little I knew about politics, the community structure, and even the basic
history of the Berkeley Area.
I had a similar experience at Women’s Clinic. I was nervous at first but after asking the client a couple of questions, she opened up and began telling me about her day and about her life. Some of the women were more vocal than others and more willing to share but they all seemed so happy to be there and so grateful that we were there volunteering. Every single women whom I foot washed for said thank you over and over again, even though all I did was wash their feet. They were so appreciative and so kind and they really made the experience a great one.
Jenine – EV
The first time I shadowed I got quite the tour of General Clinic. I shadowed a caseworker who was working with a client that needed most of the services offered that night. I was able to see how Med worked, which I really like the way Med works. I think it is awesome that the joint medical students work so closely with the doctor, and that the doctor guides them through typical doctor practices like questioning the clients on their current health, the medications they take etc. It is nice to see the UC Berkeley working so closely with the underserved population. After med we went to the chiropractor, the optometry table to set the client up for an appointment, and then to the jobs/housing table. I really like how many bases the clinic covers and the breadth of things clients can do at clinic.
The second time I shadowed was equally interesting. I tried my hands at foot washing, but it was kind of scary. I was scared I would hurt the clients when using the callus remover tool or cutting their nails. Neither clients really seemed to want to talk either, which was a bit of a disappointment. The overall experience of foot washing was good because it is pretty humbling and a new experience since I’ve never washed someone else’s feet before! After foot washing I shadowed a case worker for a bit, and I learned a lot from our client. The client was college educated, and from what I gathered the client went to a good, private university, and had recently become homeless. He talked all about growing up in, what sounded like, an upper class neighborhood on the east coast, his move to the bay, and really detailed historical happenings, like the history of Haight-Ashbury. Meeting him completely changed my perspectives on homeless people. Until then, I had been under the impression that practically all homeless people came from poverty stricken families, or came their homelessness came out of substance abuse or things related to illegal activities. This man shattered that thinking as he came from a good background, is very well educated, and carried on highly detailed conversations about a multitude of topics.
My experiences at clinic have been really good, and every time I go I learn so much more about a population that before were just stereotypes or people I barely noticed on the street. The whole experience is very enlightening.
Meghan-MS
When I first got to Berkeley, my view of homeless people was completely overthrown. I had
always pictured the homeless to be past their prime or middle aged people who
couldn’t make the transition from dependant childhood to supporting themselves,
whether they were due to nasty addictions or tragic events. It really shocked me to see groups of young
people lining the streets. Even odder
still was the fact they had animals with them, did art and played music. This did not fit the image of homelessness I
previously knew- thinking that people would be listless or angry at their
life. I imagined they spent most of
their days doing anything it took to barely survive or evade the pains of life.
Clearly these people had far more
complicated stories and were unique individuals, contrasting the faceless downtrodden
people in my mind. Due to timing
conflicts, I am unable to check out Youth Clinic, but it would be an experience
I highly look forward to in the future.Samantha Trieu- AB
I had exactly the same feelings about washing feet. At first
I was nervous because I didn’t want to hurt the clients, as many of them had
very long toe nails and heavily calloused feet. Also, I was honestly scared
that I would see an extremely dirty, infected foot or smell something really
putrid. But neither happened. One client even remarked that I wasn’t scrubbing
hard enough. I also believe that footwashing is a very humbling experience.
The man that I was talking to while washing his feet also
seemed well-educated. He didn’t speak with any slang or colloquial words and he
showed me a whole array of little trinkets and gadgets that he was carrying
around in his bag. While I didn’t get to dive deeper into his history, I could
tell that he didn’t fit into my perspective (a wrongful one) of how a homeless
person should look, talk, and act like. I hope to learn to change this
perspective while caseworking at Suitcase Clinic.
Derek-PT
I was so scared I was going to hurt my clients by scrubbing too hard, too. The first woman whose feet I was scrubbing pretty much told me that she couldn’t feel a thing I was doing, and that I had to scrub harder. She had to repeat herself twice more, because I was still afraid I was hurting her, so I would only increase the pressure I was scrubbing with by a little bit. I was also terrified of clipping the client’s toe nails; I sometimes mess up when I’m clipping mine; how was I supposed to clip someone else’s without cutting their skin too? However, it all turned out for the best.
One of the more memorable moments of the night for me was when I had to wash the feet of a mute women; we essentially had no means of clear communication, yet she somehow managed to convey everything that she wanted me to do, and I was able to wash her feet to her satisfaction.
Priya- EV
Interacting with the clients has been unbelievably
refreshing. I’ve attended Women’s Wellness Fridays a couple of times, and while
it runs later into the night (8-10pm), it’s truly therapy at the end of a
grueling week packed with incessant work and early morning lectures. The kids
immediately recognize you after your first time and gleefully bombard you with
questions about what’s planned or what you’ve been up to. During our wellness
project night, a couple of women sat at a table with Jill, Jaspreet, and me and
decorated frames. The most marvelous stories blossomed that night. One of the
younger women used to coach competitive cheer/dance teams. Her team even
qualified to nationals, but she didn’t want to take the girls to the
competition because of various factors. The other woman was brimming with
wonderful words of wisdom; she maintained such a calm, motherly demeanor and
always knew what to say to alleviate any insecurity or doubts about our own
artwork.
Youth Clinic was a change of pace, but definitely welcome.
It was a sullen, gray Monday on my first day shadowing at Youth. After being
let in, I found myself in the kitchen and assigned to make a fruit salad. While
it drizzled outside, warmth circulated throughout the kitchen as a few
volunteers and I chatted with the radio pulsing in the background. Clients
began to arrive after a while and more volunteers hustled in. The atmosphere
was very upbeat. If you’re unsure of what to do, grab a plate and a seat next
to a client during dinnertime and you won’t be at all bored. As I shadowed a
caseworker, one client told us about how he arrived from Myrtle Beach, South
Carolina. I helped a former volunteer footwash and it was a genuinely bubbly
friendship that I witnessed as the two reminisced about when the client first
arrived and how he wasn’t keen on newer volunteers washing his feet because of
the unfamiliarity. The client told us about his gardening and the wonderful
benefits of eating raw foods, which spurred our conversation onto kombucha, my
favorite superfood. It was enlightening to gain insight and knowledge about
something I drink every day yet never researched on my own.
I really appreciate and love what the Suitcase Clinic
maintains. It’s not your “classroom” education, but an education on humanity
and the care that everyone should exhibit.
Feilisha-PT
It was a cold and rainy Monday evening when I made my way to the Women’s Clinic. During the walk, I reflected over the reasons why I wanted to be a part of Suitcase Clinic. In my hometown, I did not see any homeless people occupying street corners looking for food or asking for spare change. It was not until I visited other cities that I saw one or two people standing at intersections near the traffic lights and holding a sign that quickly explained their situation. I’m embarrassed to say that I doubly checked that my doors were locked, the windows were rolled up, and that I made sure not to make eye contact. It was not until I came to Cal that I noticed many homeless men and women of various ages lining up the sidewalks of Telegraph, sleeping in front of business entrances, and searching for food on campus. I noticed that many kept to themselves and quietly went on with their business. I wanted to learn more about homelessness, the causes and what resources are available.
When I arrived to the Women’s Clinic, the women and children were just finishing their dinner. The women were talking with one another while the children ran around the room, yelling and laughing. Although I entered the Clinic feeling nervous, but once I saw the scene I felt calmer because it reminded me the playpen areas in the mall or McDonalds where parents sat around talking while the kids played. I volunteered to do nail painting. My first client was a little girl who was probably around 6 years old. As I painted her nails two different shades of pink, she told me about her day, what her favorite colors were, and what she liked to do. She was so talkative and friendly that having a conversation with her was effortless. Her happy and energetic personality was like any other child. After I finished painting her nails and she waited as long as she could for her nails to dry (5 minutes later), she ran to where the other kids were playing and proudly showed off her nails. Seeing her happy made me smile and I realized that being a part of Suitcase Clinic provides me with opportunities to meet new people, make people happy and learn from them, regardless of their situation.
Katie - AM
I feel like Katie’s post is completely relevant to me. Unfortunately,
I am guilty of having the same negative stigma. Back home, the homeless are
few, but every time we (my family) pass by some, negative comments and stories
flood the air. This made me a little scared of Berkeley initially, but after
figuring out that the homeless population had their own culture and hearing
amazing stories from friends who’ve had the pleasure of talking to some of
them, I became interested in why such a huge range of people (from youth to
even Ph. D’s) have this lifestyle.
Working at the Health Ed table at General, I was given
insight into the daily lifestyles of the homeless communities. With every mark
of an item, I found that they had very similar habits to the average person,
hoping for cleanliness, caring for their health, and sometimes just seeking
some good conversation. The main difference was that with the few supplies they
received, they were extremely grateful, with a huge “Thank You” sometimes
silently written in their expression. A whole new world is beginning to be
revealed, a culture that I never really paid attention to before, and I’m
extremely excited to be exposed.
Timothy- EV
timothytruong35@gmail.com
During my first experience shadowing, I was a foot washer at
General Clinic. I was quite nervous about this because it was my first time
being at clinic and I didn’t want to hurt a client. I quickly realized that
foot washing was a very intimate experience and people really opened up to me.
Before coming to the Suitcase Clinic I never really thought a lot about
homelessness, or how people could end up homeless. After talking to several
clients I realized that these were all just people, and they really aren’t all
that different or strange. Even though I only shadowed twice, my view on
homelessness has already dramatically changed.
My second shadowing experience was also at General Clinic,
but this time I shadowed a caseworker. I followed my caseworker up to optometry
where she was helping a client get glasses. The client in this case was a young
girl who needed glasses to help her read in school. It was amazing to me to see
how something so simple, in this case a pair of glasses, can dramatically
change someone’s life. The client’s uncle told us that their insurance did not
cover new glasses, so they were not able to get any until they came to the
Suitcase Clinic. Observing this made me proud to be part of the Suitcase
Clinic, and it is amazing to see the results of our actions immediately by
helping clients in small but powerful ways. I also really enjoyed observing in
Optometry because there were many Optometry students doing free eye exams on
clients. I also observed in OMM, Osteopathic Manipulative Medicine, which was
also great. I talked to one client for a while who has chronic pain in his neck
and knee. He said he goes to OMM every week to get treatment and that they significantly
relieved his pain. Overall, my shadowing experiences were very different but
enlightening and my view of homelessness is already different. I can’t wait to
go back!
Alex Prekeges- JL
When I shadowed at General Clinic, I was also amazed at the extent of services that people can get for free at Suitcase Clinic. I shadowed a caseworker who was taking a woman who did not speak any English up to Chiro. The caseworker, who spoke Italian, and so could communicate with her a little, was able to learn that this woman had been referred here by her doctor for back issues that were also causing problems in her legs. It is truly amazing to me that so many people, suitcasers and service providers alike, come together to give people the health care that they need and deserve. When I see how generous the service providers and suitcasers are, donating their time for no other reason than to help those who need it, it truly inspires me to want to give more of myself to others. I can’t wait to see more of the services at General.
I know exactly how you feel! It was my first time at the General Clinic when I tried hair cutting and was scared of hurting them with the razor since I had never cut hair before. It was amazing how such a simple thing such as a haircut, which is under $10 at somewhere like Supercuts, can be so life changing, if not physically, then emotionally/mentally. I also realized how down to earth these people are since they understand the value of life instead of focusing more on materialistic goods; the hardships that they have had to face has caused them to appreciate the little things that can alter their lives for the better such as the free services Suitcase Clinic provides. I too have changed my perspective on the homeless population. I had always thought of them as humans just like us and felt sorry for them, but I’ve come to realize how they are definitely not like society portrays them. I find it amazing that they can be such nice people still after society has wronged them so; often times, the clients are the ones that want to hear how my life is before talking about their own lives. This truly is an experience that I believe every person should go through instead of ignorantly judging based off of society’s misconceptions.
Nina Mirabadi- EJ
Last week was my first time to go to Suitcase Clinic ever. I went to Women’s Clinic on Monday and General Clinic on Tuesday and had great, yet different, experiences at both. At around 6:45 I began walking towards the Women’s Clinic location and I got to the street intersections at about 6:55, five minutes before check-in began. However, I could not find the entrance to the location. I walked up and down the block for about 10 or 15 minutes (mind you, it was raining) trying to find the entrance. I began to get a little frazzled and somewhat discouraged and then I finally found it! I was not in a good mood after my confusion in the rain, but when I got inside, all of the people at the clinic were so welcoming and I immediately began to talk and laugh with the coordinators and the other caseworkers and I forgot about being frustrated just a few seconds prior. We checked in and then the coordinator asked for people to foot-wash. I was hesitant at first to put my hand up because I’m not really a feet loving kinda gal. To be honest they freak me out a little bit. But after a few seconds of no one raising their hand, I decided to go ahead and give it a shot.
They gave me a quick tutorial and then just sent me out to foot wash. It was great to get right into it and talk to the clients and I actually ended up really enjoying myself (I got to wear gloves which were comforting for my weird foot phobia). I met some pretty amazing women who were very willing to chat with me and tell me about their day. There was even a woman who was new to the clinic whose feet I washed and we bonded over it being our first time at Women’s Clinic. Overall, I had a great experience with all of the volunteers and the clients and I’m excited to go back soon.
Jenine- EV
Might I first say that entrance to Woman’s Clinic is tricky! You were not the only one
who had trouble finding it.
Secondly, I too was pleasantly surprised by how easy it was to strike up conversation while
foot-washing. The women at clinic are so sweet and grateful for the necessary service,
happy to be off their feet for even a short while. One of my favorite
experiences thus far was washing the feet of a young girl who was so excited to
just have seen the movie Shark Night, she spent the next half hour describing
it to me (almost scene by scene) in great detail.
I can’t say I ever expected to bond with someone I just met by scrubbing their feet
immediately after shaking their hand.
Lastly, I greatly admire your courage and willingness to jump right in with an activity
that made you a little uncomfortable. Clinic seems like a wonderful place to
explore such opportunities!
Brenna- AC
My blog entry will be about a homeless man I met over the
summer whom, for his anonymity, I will call John. On that day, I had decided
that I would invite the first homeless person I saw to eat lunch with me, and I
saw John as I was exiting the Walgreens on Telegraph. He unfortunately responded
back saying that he was in a rush to gather enough money to buy a bus fare to Oakland, but would
appreciate a simple chicken sandwich to eat along the way. Then a man
approached John and asked if he had lost his stereo. John said that he had, and
the man replied that he had found it and would return it to him right away.
Then something utterly surprising and amazing happened. John looked at that man
in his eyes and resolutely said, “Keep it.” The man’s mouth dropped. My mouth
dropped. Here was a homeless man giving away his only possession to another man
he didn’t even know. I was shocked. And ashamed. Here am I, often lacking the
heart to give away my money, possessions, and even time to help those in need.
I came to meet John with the expectations that I would help
him. But he was the one who helped me. He showed me that he was the one who was
empowered, and I was the one driven only by sympathy. Since then, I can truly
say that John and I have built a close relationship. We will often chill
together on the streets and laugh as people give us dumbfounded stares
wondering why an old black man is hanging out with a young Asian teenager. We
laugh about it now, but I wish we didn’t have to laugh about something that
should be considered normal.
I just wanted to encourage everyone through my experience to
go and build deeper relationships with the homeless. Only then was I able to
get a better understanding of his life and realize that he’s just human like
me.
Derek-PT
I really liked your idea and decision to ask a homeless person to eat lunch with you. I think that is a good way to just jump in and expose yourself to an experience like that. Have you done things like that before or was this an impulsive kind of thing? Anyways, I think that I would probably benefit from doing something similar to that. I guess maybe I will be more comfortable with it once I get more experience with case working and interacting with clients at clinic since I have limited experience right now. Now that I think about it, going up to a homeless person and talking to them on the street is no different than approaching them at clinic. Maybe I can set small goals like having short conversations with homeless people on the way to in order to kind of warm myself up to the idea.
Jimmy – CA
jtnguyen714@gmail.com
Thanks for sharing this story! It is great that you
proactively tried to reach out to a homeless man on your own and that your have
maintained a good relationship with him. This reminded me of an experience I
had eating dinner with some homeless people with some of my friends. It was my
friend’s idea, and I was kind of hesitant at first, not knowing what to expect.
I had this preconceived notion that homeless people tend to be uneducated and
have some sort of mental illness. I was afraid of what I should say to them and
thought that I probably would not find any commonalities with them. However, to
my surprise, I found myself having a great conversation with the two people we encountered
and ate dinner with. They were really easy to talk to, and I enjoyed listening to
their life experiences. Both of them had been well-educated, but due to some unfortunate
events, they ended up on the streets. Because of this experience, my view of
homeless people changed completely. I also encourage everyone to really take
the opportunity to converse and build relationships with the homeless.
Connie- JL
Derek, that’s really cool that you’ve met John and have been
able to get to know him a lot better.
His willingness to give up his only possession so easily is definitely
challenging and is making me reevaluate exactly how much I care, and how
willing I am to be there for others. It’s
nice to see that you’re getting to know people outside of clinic where you can
really get to know them better in a more casual setting and without any time
constraints. I agree with Jimmy that I’ll
probably want to get more experience spending time with clients at clinic before
following your example. However, maybe
just realizing that someone who’s homeless is really just another person who I
can talk to and develop a relationship with and that there’s no reason to be
nervous would help too. Thanks for sharing your experience!
Peter – AM
Thank you so much for sharing this story, Derek, it was really inspiring. That was a really cool idea to invite the first homeless person you saw to eat lunch with you; much more personal than just giving money or food, and a great opportunity to get to know someone. Where did you get the idea? Did it just occur to you one day? That’s also a good way to see what they would want to eat because we can’t just assume that they will want to eat everything; one time in San Francisco I bought a bunch of McDonald’s fries to give to the homeless guys that were outside, and one guy said no thank you because he said he didn’t eat fries. It would have been much more considerate of me to buy something more nutritional, rather than empty calories that wouldn’t fill them for long and that would just be bad for their health.
It’s also really cool that you continue to hang out with him, which, like you said, isn’t something that one normally sees and that defies society norms. Kudos!
-Kira, SB
kira.labuda@sbcglobal.net
Every time I visit Women’s Clinic, my Monday night is transformed into a warm
fulfilling experience. Tonight, I trekked
down from Northside, sleepy, cold, wet. I
walked in late, and meandered for about 5 minutes looking for a service that
needed assistance. I settled upon the
children’s activities, which had about 6 kids. We started off helping the kids to frost
cookies—a little girl named S. frosted a happy face onto hers in red and green,
then added blue all around it because blue is her favorite color. I squiggled out a rose and then her name onto
my cookie, before admiring the rainbow cookie the little boy across the table
had created.
After cookies we had a ton of hyper kids on our hands. I had a lot of boys and girls who just wanted
me to hold them—they would jump up into my hands and want to sit on my
hips/arms/ piggy back ride. One little
boy just wanted me to dip him up and down, and he giggled hysterically the
whole time. (I’m grinning just replaying
this in my mind as I type this post). I
tried to get some of the kids to read a picture book with me, but the book we
grabbed was Hans Christian Anderson and way too much text to hold sugary late night
attention spans. There were animal
picture in it though, so the boy and girl sitting on my lap made donkey noises
and guessed the ending with me (we decided the rabbit would’ve won the race). I also played Legos and blocks and walked
kids to the “BIG!” bathroom, tickled a lot of bellies and smelled some nice, clean, footwashed feet.
I truly enjoy loving on the kids and talking to their moms about how great they
are. I have a 10 month old niece in San
Diego, however, and walking back from clinic the reflection on the inequality
between her and these kids did hit me. In the toys, in the stability, in
everything, it seems the cards are stacked unevenly. But one of the women at the clinic, who held
my hand and chatted with me briefly, quoted that saying that “It takes a
village to raise a child”; she told me that she didn’t have any children of her
own, but that this shelter was a community, and it was a village that would
raise the kids with love.
Silence is hard for me. I feel a constant need to fill in those awkward moments with mindless chatter, often interrupting people at the end of their sentences with questions or comments in fear of silence eroding the conversation. Today, I learned to appreciate the benefits of a good silence, as it might be exactly what someone needs.
It was my first time at Women’s Clinic, and my first time participating at the foot washing station. I was nervous, especially about cutting other people’s nails. My roommate always teases me because my own nails always end up looking like someone went at them with an old rusty army knife, and yet here I was, supposed to be cutting other peoples nails. I was terrified. After a quick tutorial, we were set off to try our luck at it. The first woman who came and visited me was very friendly, and slowly my fears began to reside.
My next client, however, barely spoke to me. I kept trying to make conversation, wanting to connect with her, wanting to be able to have one of those stories that I kept hearing about. After a few failed attempts, the conversation dissolved, and I focused on massaging, allowing the warm water to soften the callouses on her feet. I wondered if she could tell I had never done this before, if she could sense my hesitation when I had been cutting her nails.
Frustrated at my lack of experience and inability to bond with this woman, I looked up at her. Her eyes were closed, and she looked tranquil despite the busy humming of background noise. She was simply enjoying the moment and relaxing. My own insecurities and self doubt had clouded my mind so much that I forgot to appreciate the moment and realize that silence might be just what is needed. I was reminded of a line from Pulp Fiction, to “comfortably enjoy the silence” with another person, and how special of a bond that was. Silence, while sometimes hard to adjust to, is one of the most beautiful things we are given, and the ability to share that with someone else can be just as powerful as a deep conversation.
-Theresa, PT
I really enjoyed reading your blog because there were many moments when I was thinking “Yeah! Me too!”. Like you, I find myself trying really hard to avoid awkward moments and often end up interupting people. Sometimes I notice that I come up with things to say while the person is talking and I stop really listening to them. It was pleasant to “see” through your experience and what you’ve learned that silence is just as important, meaningful, and appreciative as holding a conversation.
I’m glad that you had two different types of experiences, both good in their own way. Your first client made you feel comfortable and allowed you to relax and put what you had just learned to practice. Your second client taught you that silence can be enjoyed and not awkward. Thanks for sharing your experience!
Katie – AM
Though I have been to both the Youth Clinic and the General Clinic, it was only to serve dinner in both cases, and as such, the interaction with the clients is completely different than when you are there to casework or provide services for the clients. Today was my first time interacting with clients as a caseworker/ service provider at the Women’ Clinic, and I really enjoyed it. It was a completely new experience; the women are so candid, friendly, and welcoming, as are the other Suitcase Clinic Members. The first thing that I noticed at Women’s Clinic was how different the atmosphere is from those at General Clinic and Youth Clinic; it is more comfortable and warmer, likely a result of the presence of so many women and children. I spent the night as a foot washer, which was, once again, something I had never done before. I have to say, I really enjoyed the experience more than I had expected to. There is something very soothing about massaging someone else’s feet in warm, soapy water. You can carry on a conversation with each other, or you can simply enjoy the silence. I really enjoyed the process, especially since the women looked so peaceful when they were done.
As a side note, I also ran into a woman that I had seen two weeks ago when I served dinner at General Clinic. I had briefly attempted to translate for her since she did not speak much English. Though I did not feel like I had done much for her, today she was the one who recognized and approached me. It was such a satisfying feeling to realize that someone remembered the small thing that I had done for them two weeks prior. She looked genuinely happy to see me, and I felt like I had actually made a difference for her by showing that I cared enough to try, regardless of whether or not I succeeded.
Priya – EV
I hadn’t shadowed an official case worker before last Tuesday when I
was able to attend General Clinic. I had foot-washed and served dinners (not consecutively),
but had yet to experience a case worker in action. Thus, I was excited to join
a small group upstairs for optometry, a field I know very little about, and
witness the process for myself. The young man we accompanied- “Client D” we’ll
call him- was friendly and warm, entirely grateful to receive help on his quick
trip through Berkeley.
I haven’t been to the optometrist in years, but I cannot recall ever once
enjoying my visit as much as Client D did that evening.
The volunteer staff who administered the eye exam appeared to be having
just as much fun. Client D, who had misplaced his glasses in a thorn bush one
adventurous night prior, laughed and joked the entire hour, amused by the
blurry letters he could not read with his naked eye. The exam was thorough and
completed in an hour. Client D was actually prescribed a pair of free
replacement glasses- a resource I wasn’t aware clinic offered on sight- while
the student optometrist received vital hands-on practice. I realize now, in
retrospect, that I hadn’t expected the quick checkup to be so completely beneficial
to both parties.
Before Suitcase, I would occasionally catch myself wondering why so
many young adults lined the sidewalks of Telegraph. They too are capable, able
bodied, and willing to work right? Perhaps. But working with clients at both General
and Youth Clinic has reminded me of the injustice of assumption. I can never simply
guess anybody’s situation, nor can I assume that steps that haven’t been taken to
get themselves on their feet off the street. Client D sought out a resource he
needed, one which would help him work and travel safely, one which allowed him
simply to see.
The next time I visit the optometrist (fifteen years from now), I’ll
remember Client D and feel just a bit more grateful for the resources it’s so
easy to take for granted.
brenna8alexandr@berkeley.edu
Brenna- AC
The homeless population is one of the most misunderstood groups today, but many are taking steps to change that. One such example is Jeanette Walls, who writes in her memoir The Glass Castle of her experience living in poverty and her conflicting relationship with her parents who prefer a nomadic lifestyle. One of the most provocative statements from her story is in the very beginning. While taking a cab from her enviable Park Avenue apartment in New York City to a downtown party, Walls spots her mother digging through the garbage by the side of the road. Not wanting her mother to spot her and call her out as the impostor she feels she is, Walls shrinks into her seat to hide from her mother’s gaze. When Walls later confronts her mother about the experience, her mother responds, “You want to help me change my life?…I’m fine. You’re the one who needs help. Your values are all confused” (Walls 5). There are many insights one could take away from this quote, but the one that perhaps pertains the most to this class’ experience is that homelessness is nothing to be ashamed of. The homeless lifestyle is one of frugality and humility. The tools and the insights these nomads receive are more necessary to their survival — but for that reason, they are also that much more valued. As caseworkers, we work with clients to help them meet their goals and needs. That is different, however, from saying that the lifestyles they have now are wrong. Many fall into homeless or low-income situations, particularly given today’s economy. Others, like Walls’ parents, choose such ways of life because it follows their sense of values. Thus we need to change our mindsets to be open to open to theirs in order to best serve them as caseworkers. Homelessness is not something that necessarily needs to be eliminated — that would take away the element of personal choice for that lifestyle. However, as caseworkers, we need to work towards our clients’ needs and goals, even if we ourselves do not agree with them.
Blaire – AM
I Was Homeless – by Patrick Dunn
April 2008
How five months of living among the homeless changed one college student’s perspective.
Mike Yankoski
vividly remembers the day he ate out of a trash can. It was during the same period he slept under bridges and in the streets. And that’s not all. He rarely had a bathroom to use. He was so poor he begged for money. He used tape to hold his shoes together. For a while, he walked barefoot. He was almost beat up four times. He was cussed at and kicked off property – including churches. And he said he was ignored and forgotten “by thousands.” In the middle of it all, Mike also said he “came to know some of the most incredible people and the goodness of the Lord.” Mike’s story is amazing, but maybe the most amazing part is this: Mike did it all by choice.
The Vision
Mike and a friend spent five months in six different cities living on the streets, dealing with hunger, danger, exhaustion, depression and more, all on a journey to better understand the problem of homelessness For him, it was all about putting his faith into action.
“I was in church one day, and the pastor was challenging us to ‘be who we say we are,’” Mike says. “I asked myself, ‘Am I living as a Christian should live?’ To me, faith was a lot more than memorizing some verses or going to church every week.”
Over the next 16 months, God continued to give Mike vision. He had already helped at homeless ministries through high school, and his heart was stirred. Through tons of research, prayer, talking to pastors and other godly counsel, he finally decided he needed to hit the streets.
“There are so many ways to get involved with helping the needy, but this idea resonated so much because it required so much,” Mike says. “It’s so similar to our faith – we dive in, and it requires all of us.”
There were plenty of questions. How could he survive on the streets? Could he actually impact people’s lives while having to focus on his own survival? What would happen when he left college for a semester, and what would happen once he walked away from a comfortable life in Santa Barbara, Calif.?
Mike knew the answer to one question: He didn’t want to go alone. Of course, how would you react if someone asked you if you wanted to live on the streets for five months?
“I asked guys at school and Bible school,” Mike says. “I got a lot of funny reactions.”
Then just two months before he was planning to leave, he met Sam, a friend of a friend who was visiting Santa Barbara. Only a few days later Sam told Mike he felt like God was telling him to go.
So they left.
On the Road
The guys traveled to Denver; then Washington, D.C.; Portland, Ore.; San Francisco; Phoenix; and San Diego.
The lessons came quickly. Remember the first time they ate out of the trash? Well, Mike said it only took two weeks to be hungry enough to get to that point.
“Poverty erodes a person’s sense of dignity very quickly,” he says. “We saw a guy throw away his lunch. We were hungry, and it didn’t matter.”
Another thing Mike learned quickly is how draining it was to live on the streets. “It’s really a hard, demanding, exhausting existence, even when you’re not doing very much,” he says “At home when you need a restroom, you go to the bathroom. When you’re hungry, you walk to the refrigerator. But when you’re outdoors, the majority of your time is spent meeting basic needs: finding shelter, panhandling for money, walking everywhere.”
The more he clung to his everyday survival, the more Mike clung to God. “Once on the streets, I realized the world is worse than I imagined it, so God has to be even more powerful than I imagined. It gave me so much hope.”
He also learned how much a giving heart can mean to someone who’s in need. “When someone comes by and shows you the littlest kindness, it makes such a big difference – especially when it’s done out of the love of Christ.”
Over the months, Mike and Sam learned the finer points of living on the streets: the best places to sleep to escape wind or rain, the best places and times to panhandle, and even tricks to getting around.
“Sometimes we’d get someone’s bus pass that he wasn’t going to use, and we could hop on a bus,” Mike says.
But even their best efforts came up empty at times. One night they played guitars for money at a busy intersection and made only $1.18 in four hours.
“On those nights we’d try to find a doggie bag or takeout bag somewhere or maybe go to one of the missions. Trash was the last resort,” he says.
The Challenges
There were times he was scared- such as when he woke up at 3 a.m. and someone was going through his backpack. And there were plenty of low points where Mike thought about being back at school, hanging out with his friends.
One of the lowest came in Portland in the pouring rain. Sam and Mike awake to a surprise. “I felt dirt, grime and junk all over me. We realized the whole area we were sleeping in had flooded,” he says. “Trash, bird feathers, and dirt had caked itself on us. I finally thought, Why in the world are we here? I was tempted to quit.”
But Mike says each low point was counter by faith in God’s Word. “I had to trust and say, ‘God, You are the One who protects me. You are my fortress,’” he says.
Mike says four major points kept him going during the toughest times:
1. Mike realized they were homeless by choice, which was something so many others didn’t have. At some point he and Sam would get to go home.2. They believed that God had called them to both live as if they were truly homeless. “You don’t just bail on something because it doesn’t feel good,” Mike says.
3. They had faith that the Lord would provide. “He doesn’t leave us or forsake us; we had to believe that.”4. They had to understand homelessness so they’d know how to make a difference.Unfortunately, some of the low points came at the hands of other Christians. One time they asked a pastor for help on a Sunday morning. They were out of money, and both were sick and worn down. “He told us, ‘That’s not what we do here; we’re here to worship.’”
However, Mike believes God used moments like this to add fuel to his desire to make a difference. “We meet together on Sundays, but how can it have nothing to do with how we treat others?” he says. “We make an impact for Christ not just by words but by coupling them with action. We need to live in such a way that people see Christ through us.”
The Bright Side
Sometimes in the low points God sent home through others. A guy in San Francisco bought the guys bus tickets to their next city. They found a church in Portland that opened its doors to homeless people every Tuesday night to feed them and show a movie. And a maintenance man at a church saw them sleeping outside and offered them breakfast, then had a pastor talk and pray with them.And sometimes they even had some fun. Occasionally Mike and Sam had a “jam session,” playing music with other homeless people, or had some good conversations. Other times joy came from watching the sun rise.
“You kind of draw the good moments out,” Mike says. “We can glorify God or dwell on how difficult things are. We always had a choice in our circumstances.”Coming Home
Finally the day came when Mike and Sam were picked up to go home – tired, hungry and drenched from rain. “I showered three times and still saw dirty water from my hair,” he says.In the evening, they went to dinner and didn’t have to hope for someone’s leftovers. “I ate more at that one dinner than I had in a month,” Mike says.While he celebrated being reunited with family, friends and his girlfriend, Danae (they eventually married), the transition was challenging. “I went from wondering how I’d survive one day at a time to a refrigerator full of food and a place with a lock on the door,” Mike says. “It took me almost four hours to fall asleep the first night even though I was exhausted.”He also struggled with simply things like looking people in the eyes when talking to them after so many months of feeling shame while begging.And while he prepared to return to college, Mike still felt the burdens of the people he had met. “I wondered why I was given the life I was given – I had clothes, a bathroom, a bed. I wasn’t trying to sleep while hearing cars, horns and people while looking up at the stars,” Mike said. “I almost felt guilty. I had these luxuries, but so many people didn’t have that.”Mike finished college and now works with other ministries to the homeless and encourages others to do the same, reminding them that everyone – even someone on the streets – is made in the image of God.“Matthew 25:35-40 talks about feeding the hungry and helping ‘the least of these.’ I saw firsthand how big a difference those things can mean to someone who’s in need,” he said. “You realize someone wants to bless you and help you even though they don’t know you.”Mike says efforts can be small: “Just say hi to someone on the street, ask how they’re doing, ask if they need coffee or prayer or bring them a cheeseburger.” Mike has seen how the smallest gestures have led to other conversations, even leading someone to Christ, while helping fill a practical need. “It’s an amazing idea that God can use us to answer someone else’s prayers.”And while you’re helping someone else, who know how it will strengthen your faith? It sure strengthened Mike’s.“It’s so easy for us to worry about rent, school, relationships and everything else, but God didn’t let us fall through the cracks even when we were on the streets,” Mike says. “He’s faithful. He’s worthy of our trust, but it may not always be easy.”
When shadowing for the first time at general clinic, I was taken aback by just how
valuable the services we provide are to Berkeley’s homeless population. I spent
the evening case-working with two clients who both received optometry services.
The first client had travelled all the way from his usual hang out spots in
Oregon and Washington just to come to the Suitcase Clinic in Berkeley because
he had heard about our optometry services. This client needed a new pair of
glasses and was able to receive an eye exam and schedule an appointment to get
an eyeglass prescription all in one evening.
The second client who received optometry services that evening was in desperate
need of a new pair of glasses as well. This woman was subsisting on a pair of
glasses that were 10 years old, constantly falling apart, and didn’t fit her
more recent prescription. This client has medicare coverage so was able to get
numerous eye exams in the past, but could not afford the co-pay for actually
purchasing the glasses. When listening to this woman’s struggles in obtaining
glasses, I couldn’t imagine the frustration she had. This woman had numerous
eye exams only to be disappointed again and again because she couldn’t afford
to pay for the glasses she so desperately needed. Luckily, she was able to
receive her free preliminary eye exam and was schedule for her appointment to
receive her thorough eye exam and order a new pair of glasses.
In both cases, both clients had been through significant ordeals for a service
that many of us may take for granted. This experience has added on to my
perspective of not taking my privileges as a Berkeley student for granted. Additionally,
I was amazed by the number of professional and academic programs that assist
with the Suitcase Clinic. The Berkeley optometry students that I interacted
with were incredibly professional and personable with clients and really took
their time with each eye exam to give the best care. Seeing others dedicate
their time to such a great cause was reassuring and beautiful to see.
Morwenna-BA
morwennar@gmail.com
As I read your post, Morwenna, it struck me (once again) how much Suitcase can change one’s perspective on life. The incredible ordeals that some people have to go through to even just obtain a simple pair of glasses seem almost insurmountable to me, and I don’t even need/have glasses! So many people who go to clinic and need the services are in such difficult situations, it is hard to imagine even having to face that. It is relieving to know that I (or rather, we) can help to change or improve the situations that some of these people are in. Suitcase has really forced me to see the homeless/low income population in a different way. It is so easy to take the perspective that these people are in the situation that they are in because of something they did — It is their fault. But in so many instances, it is not the person’s fault at all. And now they are in a situation where they can barely get ahold of some glasses that are the correct prescription and are not
broken!
Today was a strange yet memorable night for me. I volunteered at the General Clinic for the second time, helping in the hair cutting service again to master my hair cutting techniques. Right off the bat I got into a deep conversation with a elder indian man about Krishna Consciousness and the word of God. Being a not very religious person and unsure whether I believe in God or not, it was hard for me to have a 30 min conversation about my lack of happiness in this world without the help of God in my life. The conversation that followed was another client who has caused trouble on numerous occasions. He came in today drunk like usual, hiding a bottle of liquor under his jacket. He came up to me and asked, “how many people does it take to do one man’s haircut, like the jokes, how many people does it take to screw in a light bulb.” I wasn’t pleased with his mocking tone, similar to how he was displeased with waiting for his turn since he had not signed up for the service. We didn’t have many clients today, so he was granted his wishes and I got the chance to shave his beard. The entire time he would complain about how I wasn’t doing the job correctly, which is no surprise since as a girl who doesn’t have a beard to shave daily, it was all new for me. Thankfully James, the professional hairstylist that also volunteers, had my back the entire time and encouraged me to keep trying. The clients list was reaching to the bottom with not much else I figured would happen. At the last second though, a middle aged man wanted a haircut, and to gain more experience, I was given the opportunity to be the one to do it. He was a very caring man, very polite yet avoided talking about himself, giving the superficial answer of “good” when asked how his day was. Through intuition, I figured he was Iranian just like me, and we got into a long conversation in farsi. He opened up to me all about his life, how he has no job because of a heart attack from the previous year that has left him disabled and how lonely he is since all of his family is in Iran where he is not able to go back for over 36 years because of government/political issues. It was an amazing feeling to be able to connect with someone so well and to have them instantly trust you so much. By the end, he gave me his number and said that if I ever needed anything, he would always be there for me; he also gave me one of his hats and a couple other belongings. I found this surprising since someone who had so little was able to give away his belongs just to show his friendship and thankfulness just over a conversation. He left with a big smile on his face and kept thanking me for the haircut. He also said he plans on coming back more often, which made me feel like I actually can make a difference. It made my night and made everything worth going.
Nina- EJ
I learned a very important lesson at Suitcase last Monday. It all started when I was walking down to volunteer at Womens Clinic for the first time, and a homeless woman screamed at me: “Spare some change, Blondie?” as I walked past her. She then proceeded to break out in a very loud rendition of “Like a Virgin,” which echoed after me down the street. This put me in a very strange mindset as I headed down to volunteer for some people who were, in fact, very similar to the woman who had just yelled at me. Even though I have learned so much about the stereotypes and misconceptions surrounding the homeless community, I couldn’t help expecting Womens to be full of “crazies” who might yell at me as I walked by. Instead, I met a deaf woman who miraculously communicated very clearly to me that she wanted me to paint her nails neon orange with white flowers. She even demonstrated exactly how to paint the flowers, as I had no idea how to make nail polish flowers. She was understanding and patient when I didn’t quite get what she was trying to say to me, and was very willing to repeat her gestures and motions until I understood what she was trying to say. She was content just to sit in her chair and watch a subtitled “Dancing with the Stars” as I (and another volunteer) painted her nails. I was pleasantly surprised; This woman was calm, collected, and kind, despite her situation in life. The difficulties that come along with being deaf AND homeless seem nearly insurmountable to me, but here she was, smiling at me when I finished the two coats of polish, inspecting the color on her nails with a little twinkle in her eye.Lessons I learned: Remember to suspend judgment. And remember perspective.
Hillary- AB
hcp@berkeley.edu
Hillary, I think you paint(!) a beautiful example of overcoming
stigma. It’s so easy to generalize from one bad incident; I know I rely on
stereotypes frequently. It’s interesting, however, that defeating a misconception
is always a process that requires direct experience. As you mentioned, we’ve
learned plenty of facts in the classroom about homelessness and are vaguely
aware that it’s a sensitive matter, as well as a uniquely situational one. I’d even
argue that homeless people are more diverse than most other perceived social
groupings because their individual conditions are so drastically different from
each other. But, just like we’ve looked at graphs and step-by-step processes of
de-escalation, none of these facts are meaningful until applied. By going to
Women’s Clinic and actively changing your perception, I think you strike at the
heart of what Suitcase is all about (at least, in my opinion). It’s about
connecting the different social strata in the community and helping each other
realize that other people are living, breathing, dying, actual PEOPLE. It’s
also about empathy. You mentioned that your client was gracious and patient. I
think that’s such an important point to make, because if the people we are working
with don’t feel bad for themselves, there is no need to sympathize and feel
sorry for them. Instead, we come away with a better understanding of who they
are.
Arta – JL
artagp@berkeley.edu
When I first came to Women’s Clinic, I did not know what to expect. It was a lot less structured than I thought it would be and I ended up wandering around, a bit lost and confused. I did not shadow anyone my first day, watching from a distance as the other volunteers quickly scattered to their stations. I wound up in the main lounge and joined up with Women’s Wellness since another volunteer was already setting up nail painting and knitting supplies. Being a naturally shy person and unsure of how to start a conversation with the women, the idea of “jumping in there” was terrifying. After a failed attempt- the woman whose nails I was doing did not feel like talking that day, giving only terse replies to my meek prodding, I resigned to quietly painting nails, doing my best to be a neat and tidy, perhaps even a little hungry for approval in the unnerving situation. After she left, one of the residents called me over with a warm smile and said, “What’s your name dear? You look lost.” I was still a little flustered, but relieved to make a connection. Her initiative and ownership of the situation, combined with the presence of women lounging around comfortably (both in the room and surrounding bunk beds,) made me aware of the different dimension the Women’s Clinic brought into the caseworking dynamic. Unlike with the other clinics, we were coming into their home as guests rather than welcoming them into our turf. Another surprise I had not been expecting was the bubbly presence of children. Hearing them laughing and playing really set me at ease; I couldn’t help but smile. One of the young women I met later on had a baby on her lap, making it far easier to approach her. We sat around painting nails the rest of the night. Although my tense demeanor certainly was not helpful, I am grateful for the opportunity to experience and appreciate the hospitality of these lovely women.
Samantha- AB
Last Monday was my first time shadowing at the Youth Clinic,
and though I arrived a few minutes late due to getting lost, my experience was
nonetheless, amazing. I shadowed someone who was checking in for the first few
minutes, listening to him talk to the clients and asking them what they needing
while providing thoughtful conversation such as upcoming birthdays and the joys
of having clean socks. It was particularly popular since it was the first day
of rain and many of the clients were complaining of their soggy feet. Though
the person I was shadowing offered to have me check in clients, I declined
since I had lost my voice that day from being sick and I didn’t want to be a
hassle at the clinic. Then I was assigned to pass out supplies at the closet
with Emily, another classmate who was shadowing. It was then that I got really
upset that I had lost my voice because I could only listen to the conversations
while Emily and I retrieved the supplies. At first, we found it difficult to
talk to the clients but after some helpful conversation starters, we learned
that some of our clients had been all over the US. One of them in particular
was from North Carolina and some of the younger teen clients came from Southern
California, traveling to Texas along the way. Another one came from Hawaii and
seemed so genuinely interested in learning that he had already looked up some
Cal classes to sit in. I even gained an intellectual experience while passing
out supplies as one client so passionately lectured about some apex theory
between dogs and people, which I didn’t understand, but it was nonetheless very
humbling to listen to him. By the end of the night, things were going well
until this one client walked in and claimed that he was under 25 but had lost
his ID card. Unfortunately, I made eye contact with him as he was yelling and
he came up to me and explained the situation. Luckily, another caseworker saved
me. Though that was a frightening experience, I really look forward to coming
back to shadow and casework.
Fiona! It was so much fun working in
I agree though it was definitely a bit unnerving to see my first escalated
the supplies closet with you. It was definitely an interesting and chaotic
learning experience. I was glad to have someone else with me because it helped
me be more open to striking up a conversation with the clients who came to get
supplies. I knew that if I ran out of things to say or if I needed help and
felt uncomfortable, you’d be there to help me, even though we’re both newbies.
situation in clinic. While working in the closet it was also a bit hard to keep track of what we
had given to the clients. I realized how easily I could be convinced that I had
forgotten to give someone one of the supplies that they had requested. I
actually saw later that a client had two pairs of socks when they were only
allowed to have one. I definitely have to work on not being swayed as easily
and being confident in knowing what I’m doing.
-Emily:SL
This past Tuesday I had a really
wonderful time at Women’s Clinic. It was my second time shadowing there, and
this time, I was leading a women’s wellness activity with another volunteer,
Vedika, because we are both in the women’s wellness small group. Our activity
was homemade facials! Frankly, I was kind of tired in the beginning because I
had a long day. However, once I started making the facials for the women, talking
to them, and laughing with them, I forgot about all the stress I had been
feeling during the day and was just really glad to be there.
One of the women who were getting facials
made a comment about how she had cried all day. When I got the chance to, I
asked her what happened during the day. She started to share about how she was
in a rehabilitation program and how a friend of hers just relapsed and had to
leave the program. Not only was it hard for her to see her friend go, but it
was a painful reminder to her of how tough fighting against addiction is. She
shared about her lifelong struggle with her addiction and how she’s very proud
of her kids who didn’t follow in her footsteps. As I was listening to her, I
once again was reminded of the reality that many people are going through
incredible hardships and how compared to them, I had it way too good. When she
talked, there were tears welling up in her eyes, and I got a sense of the pain
she was feeling and probably had been feeling for most of her life. I felt a deep
desire to be of some help to her, but realized all I could really do was just
listen empathetically and try to comfort her. Even though I hadn’t done much
for her except simply give her a facial and some words of understanding and
encouragement, she genuinely expressed her gratitude to me and the other volunteers
for what we were doing. I was glad to hear that I was able to cheer her up a
bit after her difficult day, and seeing her smile really made my day.
I’m really thankful for the good
conversations I was able to have with the women. Also, I was so happy that many
of the women really enjoyed the facials. Their faces were glowing beautifully
after the avocado and oatmeal masks. Although I haven’t really been to the
other clinics, I love the relaxed atmosphere at Women’s Clinic. I can’t wait to
go back again!
Connie-JL
conniechen13@berkeley.edu
-
C
Co
I’ve only visited the Women’s Clinic, but I’ve chosen to continue volunteering at that clinic in part to the relaxed atmosphere you mentioned which is so strong there. Because Women’s Clinic is also a shelter, it has a much more homey feel to it. The first time I visited, I felt so humbled to even be allowed into their space. It felt so much more like I was invited to a gathering in someone’s home rather than being there to provide a service. And I think this affects the women as well who seem more at ease than one might expect — particularly with the newcomers. It’s extremely touching when the women open up to you, as you experienced. I think the Suitcase Clinic name invokes a lot of trust in these clients that they don’t put up as many guards as one might normally do around strangers (new volunteers). It’s extremely touching to be automatically accepted like that. I do want to volunteer at the Youth and General Clinics soon, but I’m quite content for the time being to continue with the gratifying experience I have found at Women’s Clinic, and it sounds like you’ve found your niche too. I’m glad you had as moving an experience as I had!
Blaire -AM
Suitcase
Clinic is my first effort to directly help the underserved. As such I am still
learning what it means to be homeless and what it means to be an advocate for
the homeless. It’s hard to foster empathy in ignorance, and homeless people
were once just a phenomenon that I could see from the back window of my dad’s
car, or the annoying Dameron Hospital “thank-you-for-your-donation-Mr-or-Mrs
________” letters. It’s funny how something can change when you can put a face
on it, a real face with a name and a story and perhaps a large callus on its
foot that could use a scrubbing.
My
sophomore attempt at footwashing was a particularly enlightening step towards
sincerely understanding Suitcase and its mission. My client at Youth Clinic was
a bearded fellow not much older than myself. Our conversation turned quickly to
his weekend, which had been spent at the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass free music
festival in Golden Gate Park. He talked openly about his copious drug use at
the festival with a fellow footwashee: LSD, alcohol, and marijuana. Being
somewhat familiar with the harm reduction model and nonjudgmental listening at
the point, I didn’t confront him about any health issues. After his friend
walked away squeaky clean, my client’s attention turned to self-consciousness
about drug use. He affirmed several times that he wasn’t going overboard and
was aware of the consequences. We talked about natural limits, the need for
stress relief, and the balance this need has with personal health. He obviously
had very strong moral convictions, and I hope our conversation helped further
reinforce them. By minimizing my judgment and skipping personal input, I feel
like our conversation was immensely productive.
I saw
my former client sitting on the sidewalk of Telegraph a few weeks later. It’s
amazing isn’t it, that these individuals with such genuine convictions are the very
same faces you see on the street, faces that you were once sure had no names?
Suitcase teaches that they do have names, and stories, and problems, and
answers to their own problems.
Arta – JL
artagp@berkeley.edu
Hi Arta,
Thank you for posting this, I really enjoyed reading it! I agree that I feel so differently after seeing these individuals on the street and now realizing that they do “have names, and stories, and problems, and answers to their own problems.” Sometimes it’s very hard for me to separate my own judgments when talking to clients. These situations are new for me and so take a lot of adjusting and conscious effort. For you to realize that these people can have the answers to their own problems is really empowering and gives me a lot of hope. I think that a lot of people assume people are on the streets because they didn’t have the answer to solve their problems, and that homelessness may be synonymous with helplessness and hopelessness. This is not necessarily true for everyone, and I’m glad you brought up that distinction.
Steph – PT
le.stephenie@gmail.com
I the idea that each person in clinic has a name and story is very important and I’m glad you brought it up. I am yet to run into a client outside of clinic that I’ve had a chance to talk to and get to know, but I have recognized people that I’ve seen in clinic around campus or on Telegraph. I am excited to be able to learn more about their stories as I spend more time caseworking in clinic. It’s definitely an interesting sensation, kind of like when you see a teacher outside of class and you realize that they really are real people with their own lives. I think that seeing each individual as a person, not just a client or somebody sitting on the sidewalk, is a key idea in the goal of Suitcase Clinic and is something that I am learning more and more.
Brett AB
b.briard@berkeley.edu
Hi Arta,
Like you, homeless people were to me just random people that
had no meaning to me or my life. They were separate from my life and friends
and my existence in general. But like you, suitcase clinic taught me that the
homeless people are not just people, but human beings. They have mothers and
fathers and family and friends just like the rest of us. They all have their
own stories. I once worked at the haircutting station and just like you; I saw
one of my clients on the street. That experience was very eye-opening as I realized
that the homeless are not faceless people on the street, but actual human
beings with a story. This client was someone I interacted and talked with. It
was surreal connecting the same person in two very different surroundings.
Suitcase allowed me to expand my mind and my previous thoughts about the
homeless.
James – EJ
jamesko@berkeley.edu
I guess I will write about my experience at Women’s Clinic. I have only gone two times so far in the last two weeks. I would have liked to try out General Clinic as well, since I’m the kind of person who likes having structure, but I currently can’t make it at that time. Anyways, my first experience at Women’s Clinic went well I think. Everybody, especially the coordinators, were very nice and welcoming. The first service that I signed up for was massage. I really didn’t know what to expect since the only massage experience I had was sporadic moments in the past where my friends or family would ask me to give them a massage. The first client who signed up for a massage wasn’t comfortable with me massaging her, so I just stood and observed. I learned a couple tips during the fifteen or so minutes I stood there, such as avoiding the spine, using your palms, and isolating certain muscles. I stuck around for the next client and got to actually do some massaging and I applied what I had just learned. It wasn’t too hard to do and I guess the only real thing to worry about is hurting the client, so it’s important to pay attention to their reactions. After that, I switched out and helped Jan out with the health ed. table. I thought it was pretty cool handing out various supplies and helping the clients decide which ones to pick, such as the different vitamins that were available. Women’s Clinic was particularly low-traffic that night, so it was pretty chill. After that, we started to clean up and I was surprised at how fast the time went by. Overall I thought it was a good experience, but for the future maybe I should do a service that would allow more opportunities for interactions and case working.
Jimmy – CA
jtnguyen714@gmail.com
A few weeks ago I went to General Clinic for the first time. I didn’t know what to
expect but I was sure that it would be a lot mellower than the class
coordinators made it out to be. We had just gone over de-escalation and
boundaries in the previous week’s class and I went through the practice
scenarios begrudgingly, assuming the dialogues were a bit far-fetched. I
wondered how these types of situations came up since the things we discussed
were far more emotional than I imagined was typical of a medical service
clinic.
Well as it turns out, everything the class coords said came true! In my first twenty
minutes at clinic, a fight broke out. One man near the computers made a comment
to another man that he took offense to. I got to see the clinic coordinators in
action— one came running over (in costume, it was kind of funny) to try to
break it up and any volunteers nearby jumped to their feet to see what was
happening and help. Just as the fight was starting to separate, one of the
aggravated participants turned his anger toward the security guard who was
holding him back. I was confused about the role of the security guard, thinking
maybe he was just a large client in a fancy jacket since he didn’t seem to be
very helpful in this tense situation. The security guard was asked politely to
tone it down and release the client so everyone could go their separate ways to
talk it out. Seated a healthy distance away in the gym with a few other first
time shadowers, I wasn’t sure how to respond—we weren’t trained to intervene so
I chose to stay put and carry on, observing subtly.
A few minutes later, a male client came to our table to help a group of us volunteers
make party hats for General’s 21st birthday. We all chatted for a
while but he seemed really interested in one girl in particular, asking her
more questions and getting more personal. She looked slightly uncomfortable but
when he proposed that they meet outside of clinic, she did as we practiced and
asserted her boundaries. She was polite and gave reasons why she was too busy
and couldn’t, all in all handling the situation very well. I was glad it wasn’t
me since I loathe confrontation and surely would have gotten nervous and
awkward, but I at least know what to do now!
So yeah moral of the story going into the midterm tomorrow: The things they teach us in
class are very real situations! Suitcase is a very real and intense place so
knowing how to de-escalate, assert boundaries, run through ALGEE, and be
empathetic are extremely important skills.
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A lot of things happen to one’s perspective after
choosing to come to UC Berkeley to study… Growing up in a conservative
household within a conservative neighborhood within a conservative town, I have
never made so much effort to explore past my boundaries as I have during the
past three years in Berkeley. And after only a few short weeks enrolled in and
volunteering with Suitcase Clinic, again my boundaries have been challenged and
my perspective has once again broadened – this time with respect to the homeless
and low-income population.
Serving dinner at General clinic for the first time, I was
overwhelmed by the diverse characters lined up before me, holding out their
plates. Some had looks of fatigue,
others of frustration, and many held looks of indifference. I’m not too sure
what the look on my face was, but if it reflected my emotions, then it would be
a curious look. Through a smile, I asked each client, “Would you like fruit
salad? How about corn bread?” all while wondering to myself, “How did they get
here? How long have they been coming?”
And when the crowd in front of me dwindled down as people
sat down with their first servings, I noticed a neatly dressed gentleman
sitting at the table before me, with worn out pants and a slightly disheveled
head of hair. Through his glasses, he looked around and then down, as if
contemplating some decision. Once I caught his gaze and smiled at him. He
didn’t smile back. About ten minutes later, he came up to the line and I gave
him a plate. “Would you like fruit salad? How about corn bread?” He very
politely took his dinner and sat back down to eat it. I wonder where this man
came from, if it was his first time at clinic, and why he looked so down that
night. Serving dinner that night helped me remember that initially, we all came
from somewhere, with our own set of views of about the world, and with
different ideas of where we will go once the night is over. But I guess nights
like General Clinic can offer us a place to come together and share with each
other a little bit of compassion and curiosity, even if it is only through
fruit salad or corn bread.
Steph – PT
I feel as though
your experience underlines the community that Suitcase Clinic has to offer to
people. Although you never had an engaging conversation with this man, you
clearly were touched and had a meaningful experience, even if it was only
through observation. Your detail to what he was wearing is interesting because
it was probably his clothes that made him stand out to you. One would gains
respect for someone who cares enough about themselves to make themselves look
presentable in front of other people.
I also think that
the man also had an meaningful experience, as he probably knew you had noticed
him, and appreciated the fact that you did not pester him with questions nor
give him sympathetic looks when you were serving him fruit salad and corn bread.
You are correct in that everyone has their own story, and I believe that it is
up to the person to decide whether or not they want to share their life
stories. As you pointed out, curiosity of not knowing is not a bad thing; it
keeps everyone respectful of each other.
Ann – AC
annh@berkeley:disqus .edu
My experiences volunteering at Women’s Clinic were amazing.
It’s less structured than I primarily expected, though I really enjoy the laid
back feeling of the clinic, it feels more welcoming—especially on Fun Friday’s.
My first experience at Fun Friday’s was decorating frames with the women at the
clinic. Although not a lot of the women wanted to participate in frame
decorating their mere presence in the room made it even more enjoyable.
It was just a great time to “hang-out” with the women and
just to get to know them better. Some of the women who didn’t join the frame
decorating entertained us with their fun dance moves.
Some of the women thought their art skills weren’t that
great, though we ensured them that they were. All art is different. I learned
that we could always appreciate someone’s work or at least have respect when we
put it into perspective. We were able to empower the women and make them
feel-good about their frames when they showed us their work and gave them
suggestions or advice as to how it could make it look more appealing.
I also learned that sometimes its best to stick with your
original ideas. At one point during the project one of the women who wasn’t
feeling too thrilled about her piece decided to paint something on her frame a
different color thinking it would appeal to others. Though, once she showed it
to us we told her that we liked her original idea better. I figured, that
sometimes, all these women need is a little push or encouragement to let them
embrace their creativity or who they want to express themselves as.
Projects such as these are also a great stress reliever,
especially for these women who need it most when dealing with their, sometimes,
chaotic lives. They are able to forget their situation for a few moments and/or
just feel more comfortable in sharing their stories.
jill dayrit-AR
jill.dayrit@berkeley.edu
Wow thats great that you really enjoyed your time at the womens clinc. My experience was somewhat similar, when we did the wellness project at the youth clinic some people did not want to participate in the beading or games. Some people thought it was too time consuming and difficult to manage while others were intrigued by the thought of creating art. But just like you felt like you guys were empowering the women I felt that the youth was being empowered as well because it gave them the opportunity to do something that they usually would not do. I felt like the games and beading not only brought the youth closer with one another but also broght the volunteers closer with the youth as well. Overall doing the different activities with them was quite refreshing and really eye opening to all the variety of talents that these individuals have hidden within them. After a while people really started to get in to the different activities being held and you can see them start to express them selves through the different designs they made on the beading as well as the pictures they drew. It was a great time for everyone.
jzwoodard berkeley .edu
Jessica -PT
Being apart of the youth and wellness group I decided to check out the youth clinic first. When first entering the youth clinic I did not know what to expect as this would be my first time working at a youth clinic for homeless people that were my age and above. I thought that they would be able to tell that I was new and would therefore treat me differently. Both times that I shadowed was at youth clinic and each time I shadowed I did something new. It was an amazing experience.The enviornment was very warm and fun everyone was doing something and they served rally great food. As soon as I arrived at the youth clinic there was not a time when I wasn’t working however it did not feel like work but rather close and personal interactions with other people it was very entertaining and a great way to get to know people. There was so many different things to do that I did not know where to star, however I quickly jumped into things and gave it my best shot. I shadowed with coca , foot washing, the sign in sheet and the closet. Through this brief time spent with the homeless community I already feel intertwined with them and have new understanding of the struggles they face on a daily basis. I could not imagine how different things would be if there was not these services being provided for them they genuinely appreciate the volunteers efforts and get a sense of enjoyment. This place provides them with a space to meet up with friends once a week and eat and do various activities together. These clinics are a place for them to escape their daily struggles and find a piece of mind and I am glad that I was able to be a part of that experience.
jzwoodard@berkeley:disqus .edu
Jessica-PT
Last night I worked
at General Clinic at the Heath Ed table. This was the first time I had ever
worked at the supplies table and I spent most of the night handing out
requested supplies to clients. As soon as I started working at the table, it
was go go go go non stop. As a result, I came into contact with a lot of
different types of people; some were distressed and gave me a hard time, while
other smiled politely and thanked me.
Other than the
typical razors, vitamins, cough drops, etc., I had a few people asking me if I
could give them pain killers. When I mentioned the Tylenol and Advil and other
various off the counter products, one man looked at me and asked me if I
honestly thought that would be enough for him. He asked if I got any Vikadin,
Codeine, maybe even some Morphine? I told him I was sorry and did not and he
stood their looking at me as if I had done him an injustice. At first I thought
he just wanted these drugs for no good, apparent reason. But as I thought about
it more, I realized that he could very well have been in terrible pain. No, I
never saw him limping or showing signs of being in pain, although I realized
that I had been a little bit prejudiced upon him first asking me for these
drugs. Just because these people are homeless, does not mean that they don’t
actually need these drugs. And because they are homeless, they will probably
not get access to them even if they are in dire need, which is a sad even
though it is reality.
In another incident,
a man was in the middle of telling me his five items when the woman behind him
quietly commented, “oh, wow, you can get that here?” The man looked over his
shoulder and gave her a sour look as he retorted, “You didn’t know that? Well
how long have you been homeless?” He asked it is cruel and demeaning tone, to
which the woman did not respond. She gave him a mean look, which almost
provoked more than just a small quarrel, but thank goodness the situation did
not escalate. Nevertheless, I thought
that this whole scenario was interesting because I witnessed negative attitudes
towards being homeless. My previous times working with homeless people, they
have always tried to have a positive outlook on life. Hearing the man sound so
down on being homeless helped me understand more that there homeless people who
really do want to get off the streets.
Ann Heslin – AC
annh@berkeley.edu
The two most outstanding experiences I’ve had are marked
with rejection. Don’t worry; it’s not all bad. It’s thanks to this rejection
that I’ve learned that my experiences are more meaningful than without it.
Confused? Let me continue.
For our Supplies Small Group, we had a Walgreens Drive in
order to seek donations of from shoppers that one rainy Sunday. I have to
admit: I had doubts concerning the effectiveness of this drive (“Would ordinary
strangers really spend money on those they had no idea existed?” kept burning
through my head). It did not help that the first few individuals I tried to speak
to flat-out rejected even my talking to them. At around 11, people began
flooding in, and I decided to try again. To my amazement, people began
accepting the flyers (with genuine interest, I might add!) and our supplies
bags started becoming heavier and heavier. Most donated one or two items,
others donated entire bags full of items, and no matter how dark the sky, I gradually
started believing there are people outside of The Suitcase Clinic genuinely
cared about the welfare of others.
Fast-forward a few weeks. At the beginning of my night at
Women’s, I was set on trying out massage, something I’ve never done before.
After learning some tricks of the trade, I was excited to utilize my newfound
skills. Unfortunately for me, the first client that I was anxious to massage
requested that she would only want females to help her: rejection. Kind of
saddened, I decided to go back to shadowing, learning all about the Trapezius
and Scapula among other things. I was again energized, and thankfully, the next
client did not mind that I was male! I began massaging her legs, careful to
avoid a bad ankle, completely enjoying the experience. The client kept saying
she was “in heaven,” flooding complements, and I was giddy for helping her and
for this experience.
Had I not been rejected, I may have never the true meaning
in these seemingly different (but completely related) experiences that happened
in the past few weeks, but instead have done it “because I had to.” And most
importantly, I’ve learned that despite however many times I do get “rejected”
or “turned down,” I have to persevere because those instances of genuine
happiness are all worth it.
Timothy- EV
timothytruong35@gmail.com
I have yet to experience General
Clinic (but I hope to be able to soon!) I’ve volunteered at both Women’s Clinic
and Youth Clinic and I’ve learned a lot and had a lot of fun every time. In
terms of volunteering, I’ll be honest and say I was a bit shocked and
overwhelmed by the amount of physical work we do as caseworkers. Occasionally,
I volunteer at Newman’s Loaves and Fishes and I share a meal with the homeless
and low income, so being with them was nothing new, but actually serving them
and cleaning up afterwards (especially in the kitchen) was so physically
draining for me. The first time I volunteered was at Women’s Clinic and I did
massage the entire time. It was a lot of fun and I got tips from Diane about
massaging, but I was sweating so much by the end and my fingers and arms were
so sore. I really enjoyed talking to the women though and being able to serve
them by relieving some of the stress and tension that had built up throughout
the day in their muscles. By the time I got home, I was ready to just sleep. I
had a similar experience at Youth clinic when I helped out in the kitchen.
After a long night of helping out with the wellness project and cutting up
bread and fruit, it was time to clean up. We had cut up a lot of fruit that
night and the kitchen table and floor were super sticky. There were also
buckets full of mushy and moldy food, but we had to clean up. That night I went
through numerous rags as I dried all the cups and dishes and silverware that we
had used that night for dinner as well as all the serving trays. Just when I
thought we had cleaned them all, someone would come in with more dishes and
it’d be back to drying. Once the surfaces of the kitchen were all clean and the
dishes were put away, I realized that the floor still had to be mopped. If I
had been by myself and I hadn’t seen everyone working so hard around me, I
probably would have just walked away and let someone else deal with the floors,
but when one of the youth coordinators asked me to mop I gladly accepted. It’s
so rewarding to be able to serve the underprivileged alongside a community of
people who are just as, if not even more, dedicated and excited about serving
others as I am. I’m looking forward to developing a relationship with the
clients at the clinics as well as with my fellow suitcase caseworkers!
oops..I forgot to do my name and stuff…
-Emily: SL
echang620@berkeley.edu
I really
like your honesty in this post and that you share how you truly felt; and also
kudos to you for how much hard work you put in both times at clinic. It is
great to see that I was not the only one physically drained every time I
caseworked at a clinic. But I feel like that is the whole purpose of this all;
making us stronger both physically and mentally to deal with peoples that are
different than us and learning that we have a long way to go! I definitely feel
the “Suitcase Team” is a great team to be a part of, because you
realize everyone else is dealing with situations similar to yours and will be
there for you when you need assistance or just someone to talk to. And I
believe the more time goes on and we get to know each other better, it will
only make our experiences more fruitful and fun!
Mahya – AB
m.jaberiansari@berkeley.edu
During my second visit to the General Clinic, I had the
opportunity to shadow dental at the Berkeley Free Clinic. I went in there not
really knowing what to expect. Within the first few minutes there I not only
got the meet the dentist and everyone else working there, but I was informed
about how the department worked and how they managed to get supplies. They
talked to us about different connections they have, donations received from
different organizations, and even the clinic’s hopes and future plans. What struck
me the most however, was one of the clients that was seen that night. While he
was being seen, he shared that he had just recently gotten hired and would be
relocating. Regardless of what type of job he had been offered, the emotion and
happiness I witnessed that night was incredible. There was a sincere and
genuine vibe of happiness not only from the client part, but the Dentist and
everyone else in that room. It was at that moment where I witnessed and truly
understood the uniqueness of the Suitcase Clinic’s mission. The way these
people reacted when they heard the news revealed a sense of caring and strong
familiarity with the client, something very hard to find in other
dental/medical facilities. Seeing not only the client be hopeful and thankful
for this great opportunity and what his future held, but the rest of the room
share this emotion with him made it extra special and made me want to be part
of it as well. It was definitely a beautiful scene; to see someone bring
themselves back up on their feet regardless of what their circumstances might
have been, and know that you were a part of it. Cases like these are what make Suitcase
and everyone efforts and dedication worthwhile.
Ivette-MA
i_armenta@berkeley.edu
The last thing I ever imagined happened to me at
clinic. I overcame my fear of animals (specifically a kitty in this case) by
just attending Youth Clinic once. Unfortunately, and I don’t really know why,
but I have always been afraid of animals and pets. It’s not that I want to be
scared, but instinctively I just can’t come close them. Last Monday at Youth Clinic,
as I was proactively practicing my case-working skills (knowing the midterm is
a few days away), I decided to approach a client who was holding the most
adorable little kitten I have ever seen. Knowing I wouldn’t be able to pet it,
I kind of stood further back. I just started conversation with the client by
asking about the kitten and socializing. Eventually, from feeling so
comfortable just speaking and knowing I have been blessed to be able to
experience such great things as getting to know people I never would have,
something came over me and I decided to hold the kitten in my own hands and
just play with it. I was shocked out of my own mind! I just couldn’t believe it
was happening. After leaving clinic that night I thought about everything that
had happened that night as I was walking to my car. Never would I have imagined
that my first experiences at clinic could be so friendly and relaxed that I’d
benefit in more than just one way. Not only did I overcome my fear of animals
(small ones of course!), but I also realized how much I actually love being in
clinic. Just from a simple interaction as this, and all thanks to the kitty! I
also remembered the feeling I had before I showed up at 5:45pm that Monday
night. I was very nervous, not knowing what to expect. I had heard that Youth
is structured differently than General Clinic is and therefore shied away from
new “challenges”. However as I was thinking back at it, it made me smile to
realize that there was nothing to shy away from and if anything, I the
difference in structure only made it just as pleasurable to help. It was a very
chillaxed environment, and I will always remember my first experience at Youth
Clinic!
Mahya – AB
m.jaberiansari@berkeley.edu
Since I have spent the first rotation in the dinners small group, most of my experience at clinic has been either serving or preparing food. Serving dinner at General Clinic’s 21st birthday was a fun, although somewhat hectic experience. I found it hard to say no to those who asked for an extra scoop of food, or came back for seconds before we had decided to serve it because I knew that this was possibly their only hot meal for the day. I found myself wondering what right I had to say no when I was going to go home and have food waiting for me. But I realized that it was necessary, since giving one person two servings might mean one less person that could be served later. Although it was hard to see the disappointment after refusing someone, it was outweighed by the gratitude that could be seen by the majority of clients that came through the line.
My second experience at general clinic was spent shadowing a caseworker for medical. While waiting to be assigned to a caseworker, I decided to go and talk to a client I saw sitting at a table by herself. The first thing I noticed was that she did not speak English very well, so I was not expecting the conversation to go on very long. However I quickly realized that she was happy to have someone to talk to, and even though there were times we didn’t understand each other completely, I’m happy that I didn’t give up on the conversation at the first awkward pause or confused look. She told me how she had bought a sewing machine and taught herself to fix clothes, which I imagine is a pretty useful skill in the underserved community. She said that she was homeless for months at a time and was here tonight to try to find housing, hoping to find a room in the church but willing to take anything that could be provided to her. After some time I was called over to start shadowing, but I am glad that I took the chance to meet someone new and I hope that she was successful in finding a place to stay.
Brett-AB
b.briard@berkeley.edu
It was also very difficult for me to say no to clients who wanted seconds at the dinner at General Clinic. I told them that we were trying to make sure that everyone would receive firsts and that they could come back in about 10 minutes. Many of them understood, but others looked irritated and angry. Even when we were serving firsts, many clients complained that the servings were too small and they would stand there with a look that clearly implied “that’s it?” I tried to understand where many of these clients were coming from though. Their frustrations are a result of the unimaginable hardships they experience every single day. They are hungry and all they want is a hot meal. They see a large table full of food and it looks like we are holding out on them. After a while, it got easier to say no though, and I learned to stand my ground. Eventually all the food went, and clients came up to us expressing how appreciative they were that we cooked for them. I am very excited to cook for general clinic again this weekend!
Deanna – SA
dyee90@berkeley.edu
Last week I had three midterms, and after class on Thursday I was utterly exhausted. While walking out of class Jan mentioned that she organized a meditation workshop at women’s clinic, and because I had such a hectic week I decided to tag along and try to de-stress.
When we arrived at clinic the atmosphere was crazy. The area was buzzing with activity and the staff was incredibly busy and seemed taken aback by our need for a space to meditate. Meanwhile the health coords were trying to gather up women to join our meditation group. While waiting, I met the Art of Living teacher that had come to volunteer, a petite young woman only a few years older than myself. She introduced herself and told me about how she had volunteered as a meditation teacher all around the world, and now she runs her own business in San Francisco. I was enthralled by her story, but I began to question if she could really help and connect with anybody at a homeless clinic.
In fact, as I absorbed the chaos around me, I couldn’t help but wonder if meditation would really help anybody here. These women were dealing with homelessness, unemployment, abuse, etc., so would any of them really care to sit on the floor in a dingy room and close their eyes for half an hour? I wondered if maybe meditation was a luxury for the lucky. Maybe meditation can solve the stress of my three midterms, but will it really help any of these women?
After 20 minutes three women had joined us, and the staff reluctantly gave us a back office to meditate in. The Art of Living teacher sat on the floor in the middle of the many file cabinets lining the walls. We all tightly squeezed in around her and fell silent. We could hear a Bible Study lesson happening literally 5 feet away from us. I thought to myself – well if nothing else, I’ll learn a little bit of religious morality while I’m here. It turned out I gained much more from this little endeavor than that.
The teacher began by saying – “We all have many problems, and the thing is no one person can really solve them. We tell our friends and our family, but most of the time the best they can do is tell you it’ll be alright. That’s not really a solution.” Instantly the three women started nodding. She went on to say that she too cannot offer a solution. But she can help. She said that if in a day we can take a break from all our stresses, if we can clear our mind even for 15 minutes, we could deal with our problems in a better way and with a better attitude. The women seemed to appreciate this – an admission that this teacher really doesn’t have any solutions, just a way to make things a little easier.
The woman then went through a guided meditation, and I could literally feel the room calm down. After 30 minutes we opened our eyes and I felt a release, a slight weight of my shoulders. Looking around I saw this feeling reflected on all three women’s faces and I felt for an instant a strong connection to them.
I left realizing that yes, my problems and these women’s problems are completely different. No comparison. But the way we want to deal with them can be their very similar. I cannot know the depth and immensity of their problems, but I perhaps can know what release they need.
I gleaned new understanding into the meaning of emotional health that day. Yes, meditation can be for everybody. Simple things like painting nails, footwashing, and knitting does make a difference. They are not solutions. But they make life easier and are appreciated. After that Thursday, I have taken my role as a volunteer at the clinic more seriously. As menial as giving a facial or a massage may seems, I really do believe that I’m making a difference.
Vedika – SL
I ended up doing foot washing at General Clinic a couple nights ago to
fulfill my second shadowing requirement. It was probably one of the last things
I expected to be assigned to, but a part of me was hoping that I would get to
try it out. After the foot washing coordinator explained the whole process to
me, I was let loose. My first client was a middle-aged, African American woman.
I felt a bit insecure with my skills at first, not knowing if I was scrubbing
hard enough or hurting the client when I was trying to get the dirt between her
toes, but I eventually relaxed once we started talking. I felt like it was
easier to chat with her because we were already interacting in a
physical way. We talked about what she did that day, her family that was at the
clinic with her, and what nail polish colors she liked. Her favorite color is
pink.
My second client seemed a bit embarrassed about the condition of his feet.
He told me about all the walking that he had to do because he couldn’t afford
the two dollar bus fare and the week before someone had stolen the insoles from
his shoes while he was sleeping, so his feet were very tired. It made me think
of all the things that we take for granted, such as food, a warm bed, and clean
socks. Many things that we feel indifferent towards are luxuries to others.
I wasn’t disgusted like I thought I would be by washing someone else’s feet.
I tried to understand where they were
coming from. Their calloused feet and long, yellowed toenails seemed to capture
the reality of the some of the difficulties they face on the streets on a daily
basis. I thought I would feel tired and irritable by the time clinic
ended, having started my day with two midterms, but I completely forgot about
everything that was stressing me out that day while I was at clinic. Instead, I felt
refreshed, a little sad, more grateful for the things that I have, and glad
that I was able to help someone. Foot washing was a humbling experience and
it helped expose me to some of the difficulties of being homeless in a truly
tangible way.
Deanna – SA
Having lived in an urban neighborhood in Los Angeles my
entire life, the homeless were just fixtures on the streets. Whenever I’d walk
around Downtown LA, I’d be sure to see many homeless. Whenever I rode the metro
subway line, there were homeless people. Although these people were a part of
my daily experience as a resident of Los Angeles, I never thought to try and
help them. I never thought about these people as actual living human beings.
They were just there and didn’t affect my life. However, Suitcase Clinic has
changed that for me.
The clinic is my first attempt at helping the homeless
population and undeserved in general. I had done some community service in high
school, but it didn’t add up to much. As a freshman, I thought that I would
join an organization where I could help others out in a meaningful way. That’s why
I decided to join suitcase and it has met all my expectations.
I have been to general clinic three times so far and each
and every time was enjoyable. The first time I went to clinic, I was surprised
by the number of people that came to the clinic. I observed the workings of the
clinic and looked around each of the stations such as foot washing, etc. I then
proceeded to work at computer literacy.
At complit, I was able to help an older gentleman with his
resume and I got to know him a little bitter. I talked with this man and found
he was a very nice, down to earth guy. I was able to help him to learn how to
use e-mail and how to attach his resume to it. Having grown up in this
electronic age, I took for granted the knowledge of such mundane skills. But I realized
that these simple skills were very important. Being able to help the client to
hopefully get a job was a truly satisfying experience.
Suitcase clinic taught me that these homeless people are not
just fixtures on the street, but are actual people with families, friends, and
that we are all connected through our human kinship.
James – EJ
jamesko@berkeley.edu
I Was Homeless – by Patrick Dunn
April 2008
How five months of living among the homeless changed one
college student’s perspective.
Mike Yankoski
vividly remembers the day he ate out of a trash can. It was
during the same period he slept under bridges and in the streets. And that’s
not all. He rarely had a bathroom to use. He was so poor he begged for money.
He used tape to hold his shoes together. For a while, he walked barefoot. He
was almost beat up four times. He was cussed at and kicked off property –
including churches. And he said he was ignored and forgotten “by thousands.” In
the middle of it all, Mike also said he “came to know some of the most
incredible people and the goodness of the Lord.” Mike’s story is amazing, but
maybe the most amazing part is this: Mike did it all by choice.
The Vision
Mike and a friend spent five months in six different cities
living on the streets, dealing with hunger, danger, exhaustion, depression and
more, all on a journey to better understand the problem of homelessness For
him, it was all about putting his faith into action.
“I was in church one day, and the pastor was challenging us
to ‘be who we say we are,’” Mike says. “I asked myself, ‘Am I living as a
Christian should live?’ To me, faith was a lot more than memorizing some verses
or going to church every week.”
Over the next 16 months, God continued to give Mike vision.
He had already helped at homeless ministries through high school, and his heart
was stirred. Through tons of research, prayer, talking to pastors and other
godly counsel, he finally decided he needed to hit the streets.
“There are so many ways to get involved with helping the
needy, but this idea resonated so much because it required so much,” Mike says.
“It’s so similar to our faith – we dive in, and it requires all of us.”
There were plenty of questions. How could he survive on the
streets? Could he actually impact people’s lives while having to focus on his
own survival? What would happen when he left college for a semester, and what
would happen once he walked away from a comfortable life in Santa Barbara,
Calif.?
Mike knew the answer to one question: He didn’t want to go
alone. Of course, how would you react if someone asked you if you wanted to
live on the streets for five months?
“I asked guys at school and Bible school,” Mike says. “I got
a lot of funny reactions.”
Then just two months before he was planning to leave, he met
Sam, a friend of a friend who was visiting Santa Barbara. Only a few days later
Sam told Mike he felt like God was telling him to go.
So they left.
On the Road
The guys traveled to Denver; then Washington, D.C.;
Portland, Ore.; San Francisco; Phoenix; and San Diego.
The lessons came quickly. Remember the first time they ate
out of the trash? Well, Mike said it only took two weeks to be hungry enough to
get to that point.
“Poverty erodes a person’s sense of dignity very quickly,”
he says. “We saw a guy throw away his lunch. We were hungry, and it didn’t
matter.”
Another thing Mike learned quickly is how draining it was to
live on the streets. “It’s really a hard, demanding, exhausting existence, even
when you’re not doing very much,” he says “At home when you need a restroom,
you go to the bathroom. When you’re hungry, you walk to the refrigerator. But
when you’re outdoors, the majority of your time is spent meeting basic needs:
finding shelter, panhandling for money, walking everywhere.”
The more he clung to his everyday survival, the more Mike
clung to God. “Once on the streets, I realized the world is worse than I
imagined it, so God has to be even more powerful than I imagined. It gave me so
much hope.”
He also learned how much a giving heart can mean to someone
who’s in need. “When someone comes by and shows you the littlest kindness, it
makes such a big difference – especially when it’s done out of the love of
Christ.”
Over the months, Mike and Sam learned the finer points of
living on the streets: the best places to sleep to escape wind or rain, the
best places and times to panhandle, and even tricks to getting around.
“Sometimes we’d get someone’s bus pass that he wasn’t going
to use, and we could hop on a bus,” Mike says.
But even their best efforts came up empty at times. One
night they played guitars for money at a busy intersection and made only $1.18
in four hours.
“On those nights we’d try to find a doggie bag or takeout
bag somewhere or maybe go to one of the missions. Trash was the last resort,”
he says.
The Challenges
There were times he was scared- such as when he woke up at 3
a.m. and someone was going through his backpack. And there were plenty of low
points where Mike thought about being back at school, hanging out with his
friends.
One of the lowest came in Portland in the pouring rain. Sam
and Mike awake to a surprise. “I felt dirt, grime and junk all over me. We
realized the whole area we were sleeping in had flooded,” he says. “Trash, bird
feathers, and dirt had caked itself on us. I finally thought, Why in the world are we here? I was
tempted to quit.”
But Mike says each low point was counter by faith in God’s
Word. “I had to trust and say, ‘God, You are the One who protects me. You are
my fortress,’” he says.
Mike says four major points kept him going during the
toughest times:
1. Mike realized they were homeless by choice, which was
something so many others didn’t have. At some point he and Sam would get to go
home.
2. They believed that God had called them to both live as if they were truly
homeless. “You don’t just bail on something because it doesn’t feel good,” Mike
says.
3. They had faith that the Lord would provide. “He doesn’t
leave us or forsake us; we had to believe that.”
4. They had to understand homelessness so they’d know how to make a difference.
Unfortunately, some of the low points came at the hands of other Christians.
One time they asked a pastor for help on a Sunday morning. They were out of
money, and both were sick and worn down. “He told us, ‘That’s not what we do
here; we’re here to worship.’”
However, Mike believes God used moments like this to add
fuel to his desire to make a difference. “We meet together on Sundays, but how
can it have nothing to do with how we treat others?” he says. “We make an
impact for Christ not just by words but by coupling them with action. We need
to live in such a way that people see Christ through us.”
The Bright Side
Sometimes in the low points God sent home through others. A
guy in San Francisco bought the guys bus tickets to their next city. They found
a church in Portland that opened its doors to homeless people every Tuesday
night to feed them and show a movie. And a maintenance man at a church saw them
sleeping outside and offered them breakfast, then had a pastor talk and pray
with them.
And sometimes they even had some fun. Occasionally Mike and Sam had a “jam
session,” playing music with other homeless people, or had some good
conversations. Other times joy came from watching the sun rise.
“You kind of draw the good moments out,” Mike says. “We can
glorify God or dwell on how difficult things are. We always had a choice in our
circumstances.”
Coming Home
Finally the day came when Mike and Sam were picked up to go
home – tired, hungry and drenched from rain. “I showered three times and still
saw dirty water from my hair,” he says.
In the evening, they went to dinner and didn’t have to hope for someone’s
leftovers. “I ate more at that one dinner than I had in a month,” Mike says.
While he celebrated being reunited with family, friends and his girlfriend,
Danae (they eventually married), the transition was challenging. “I went from
wondering how I’d survive one day at a time to a refrigerator full of food and
a place with a lock on the door,” Mike says. “It took me almost four hours to
fall asleep the first night even though I was exhausted.”
He also struggled with simply things like looking people in the eyes when
talking to them after so many months of feeling shame while begging.
And while he prepared to return to college, Mike still felt the burdens of the
people he had met. “I wondered why I was given the life I was given – I had
clothes, a bathroom, a bed. I wasn’t trying to sleep while hearing cars, horns
and people while looking up at the stars,” Mike said. “I almost felt guilty. I
had these luxuries, but so many people didn’t have that.”
Mike finished college and now works with other ministries to the homeless and
encourages others to do the same, reminding them that everyone – even someone
on the streets – is made in the image of God.
“Matthew 25:35-40 talks about feeding the hungry and helping ‘the least of
these.’ I saw firsthand how big a difference those things can mean to someone
who’s in need,” he said. “You realize someone wants to bless you and help you
even though they don’t know you.”
Mike says efforts can be small: “Just say hi to someone on the street, ask how
they’re doing, ask if they need coffee or prayer or bring them a cheeseburger.”
Mike has seen how the smallest gestures have led to other conversations, even
leading someone to Christ, while helping fill a practical need. “It’s an amazing
idea that God can use us to answer someone else’s prayers.”
And while you’re helping someone else, who know how it will strengthen your
faith? It sure strengthened Mike’s.
“It’s so easy for us to worry about rent, school, relationships and everything
else, but God didn’t let us fall through the cracks even when we were on the
streets,” Mike says. “He’s faithful. He’s worthy of our trust, but it may not
always be easy.”
Tiffany – BE
(I hope this is acceptable. I literally spent two hours
typing this up from a magazine I dug out from my library.)
Both the times I’ve shadowed so far have been at Women’s
Clinic. The smaller setting and
environment conducive for getting to people were the main draws for me. Also, the opportunity to spend time with
children was pretty exciting because that’s always fun. I admit I was a little bit nervous on my
first time because I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect or it would be weird
being one of the only guys there but that night was great. I did not end up playing with children like I
originally planned but tried out foot washing instead.
With no specific instructions on the actually act of washing,
I found myself somewhat thrown into the art of massaging feet. However, the women were encouraging and were
gentle in letting me know when they didn’t like something. Their eagerness to share about their lives
and the different things they had to go through during the day or what their
plans were helped put me at ease. I didn’t
have to overstress about whether I was doing everything perfectly but was just
getting to know someone new. Something
that surprised me was that a number of women that have siblings or children who
have high end jobs and are very well off.
I always assumed that people going through financial difficulties, homelessness,
or unemployment would have families going through similar struggles which
obviously is not true. There probably
are a lot of issues or reasons that can complicate a situation like that but I’m
still having a hard understanding why their close families wouldn’t be more
helpful.
My second week at Women’s Clinic I decided to stick with foot washing. Again
it was a great experience and the last woman whose feet I washed had so much to
share with me about her past that we continued talking until clinic ended. Initially foot washing doesn’t seem like the
most enjoyable service to help out with but I found it to be really rewarding
and enjoyable.
Peter – AM
So far, I have shadowed at the youth clinic and general clinic. During my first shadowing at the youth clinic, it really opened up my eyes. I have done outreach, facilitated the youth wellness project, helped out with dinner, and foot-washing. However, it is from a conversation I had with one of the client, that changed my perception on the homeless population. Before entering the suitcase clinic, I have always thought that the it would be hard to communication with clients, that they might be rude or unengaged in conversations. However, my first conversation with this client went surprisingly well. It was after dinner and I decided to try out foot-washing for the first time. I met with my client and informed him that this is my first time doing foot-washing. We started with chatting about his family, and it turned into a conversation about the services he received at the clinic. It turned out that he had not received foot-washing service before. However, he had decided to treat his mother to a pedicure at a salon two weeks ago. We then shifted our conversation to the “patch” he made from the youth wellness activity. I noticed that the patch is in purple and I asked him why. He mentioned that the color purple means dance and it is for dancer. He is a dancer himself and he would like to offer me the patch as a gift. I told him that I can’t take it; however, I appreciated his offer. From this small conversation we had, I realized that our client might be homeless, but it does not stop them from being their true self. The fact that he treated his mother to a pedicure, instead of receiving one himself, have shown the care and compassion in him, as opposed to what I expected. As for the gift he offered, it have shown that he was thankful for the service. Overall, my client appeared to be very nice and friendly, as opposed to what I would expected for my first experience. I would say that I am more comfortable with talking to clients from now on.
Cynthia-EV
cynxrain@hotmail.com
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For
my blog post I’d like to tell you about a few of my experiences that I’ve had
so far with the Suitcase Clinic.
My first time at one of the clinics was helping to cook and serve dinner
at Youth Clinic with the rest of my Dinners small group members. I was disappointed that the Suitcasers
all sat together for dinner, separately from the clients. But then I noticed one of my fellow
Dinners members, Deanna, talking to a client, and decided to join in the
conversation. This was my first
interaction with a client, and it was pretty cool. The client told us about himself and how he was happy about being
able to do his own thing, on his own time. He was really laid-back and personable, and it was cool to
hear about someone that enjoyed the nomadic lifestyle, rather than what is
probably usually the case. I saw
him again when I was walking to General Clinic to help serve the birthday
dinner, and he gave me a hug and we walked there together. It was nice to have that connection
outside of clinic as well.
My first time shadowing was at the
General Clinic, and at first I felt quite shy and didn’t feel comfortable striking
up a conversation with clients.
However, some middle-aged black guys sitting together invited me into
their conversation, which was really nice since I didn’t feel comfortable
inviting myself into any conversations.
At first I made some small talk with them, which progressed into talking
to one of them in particular. He
was really friendly and down-to-earth and we had a good time talking and
laughing. He even gave me a hug,
which didn’t make me uncomfortable at all, and I was able to help him get
referred to a free eye appointment and glasses.
Another memorable client that I met
at General was an 11-year-old British boy that had moved to the U.S. just
earlier this year. He had drawn
out a very complex board game on some sheets of paper and was explaining the
rules and strategies to me and another Suitcaser. I was so impressed with how intricate it was! He had such an incredible imagination. I can’t imagine being homeless, yet
alone being homeless as an 11-year-old.
Luckily, I think he has his father and brothers for company.
I look forward to meeting many more
interesting individuals!
Kira- SB
kira.labuda@sbcglobal.net
Fragments
from January 2009
(with
minor modifications)
During
30 Hour Famine, I volunteered with my church and City Team Ministries in San
Francisco, which specializes in caring for the poor and homeless. Services
include a residential addiction recovery program, learning and career
enhancement center, homeless ministries and community outreach, and a
translational shelter and job empowerment program. City Team is located in the
heart of the Tenderloin District, which is infamous for being one of the lowest
income neighborhoods of San Francisco with large populations of homeless,
disabled, and ex-offenders. I was able to visit the ministry center with teams,
and we collected and distributed free food to individuals (usually men) living
in the poor apartment-like hotels and also prayed with and for them.
To
overcome any perceived barriers to communication, I came with my heart and ears
open so that I could be most receptive to the people I came into contact with.
I allowed myself to be open in the sense that I became very vulnerable and
approachable both to the recipients of the food and prayer as well as to my
team. During the day I also allowed myself to give my heart, thoughts, and
prayers over to each and every individual so that each and every person would
feel significant, valuable, and most of all loved and cared for.
The
rawness of the deep depression and hurt was clear in their eyes and in their
stories, and I wanted nothing more than to touch the pain and hope for a
healing of some sort through compassion and understanding (more than advice,
often times individuals in these particular situations, such as homelessness,
desire desperately to be heard). With this openness and eager desire to serve,
I know that the perceived barriers of socio-economic backgrounds, current
situations, and even past histories (such as addiction and abuse) transformed
into means of connecting through the simple truth of the human condition and
love.
–
Strangely
enough, one of my reasons (a personal reason) for attending UC Berkeley is
actually because of the large homeless population in the city of Berkeley,
especially in the areas surrounding its campus. Ever since my City Team
experience as aforementioned, I have had an unquenchable urge to do all that I
can to serve the homeless, (a highly-marginalized population) and I have put
this call into action. One of my ultimate goals to be fulfilled during my time
here at UC Berkeley is actually to meet and build meaningful relationships with
all or most (understandably difficult) of the homeless individuals that I see
on the streets of Berkeley. As of now, this aspiration has taken flight and has
definitely yielded blessings and positive outcomes.
I
have come to know four particular individuals (Mike, “Reverend” Jerald,
“Reverend” Jerald’s dog Unsy Wunsy, Jeremy) very well and have become
acquainted with countless others (Roger, Wild Bill, John, Pink Cloud, Edward,
etc… are the names which I can recall off the top of my head) through genuine
conversation and meals alike. I have come to the point where I know their
personalities and some of the eating habits as well. Since meeting Mike
especially, I can say that my life has definitely changed for the better. We
have had dinner together on many occasions, exchanged affections (hugs and
handshakes,) and have had good conversations sometimes lasting even more than
an hour at a time. To be honest, I can say that we have definitely become
friends. At times I miss him during the day, just like I would miss any of my
other friends and make the effort to see him at his usual “spot” so that we can
exchange life stories and share time together. We also became close enough to
the point where phone numbers were exchanged, and we called each other perhaps
every day for the first week (the week we exchanged numbers) and sometimes
multiple times a day, and then later every few days after that (until his
service was disconnected). Our relationship extends to also a semi-spiritual
one as well, and we have attended church services on a few occasions. We have a
level of trust that was unparallel to any that my realistic imagination
(another paradox) could conjure up, and I feel blessed to have been able to
have the privilege of meeting him.
On
another note, a couple months ago (November 2008, my Freshman year,) I was
assaulted by a homeless man and was brought to more than tears because of the absolute
insensitivity (understatement) of his act. After the incident I felt hurt,
vulnerable, ashamed, and the like; however, I rationally realized that such an
occurrence would never stop me from loving, caring about, serving, and being an
advocate for homeless individuals in Berkeley. Though very shaken for a few
weeks after the incident, I continued and still continue to make what I call
“runs” (I enjoy running.) My runs consist of walking (ironic) around Berkeley
usually at night (not uncommonly until two or three in the morning) with a
friend to distribute donut holes, home-made brownies, other foods, and hot
chocolate and exchanging conversations of varying lengths.
Most
of all, I look forward to strengthening already existing relationships with
homeless individuals as well as developing more meaningful relationships with
those who I do not know very well now and with those who I have not yet met.
End
of Fragment from 2009
Tiff
- BE